Top 5 Songs on the Top 5 Albums by Your Top 5 Artists

By far the most ambitious project we've undertaken on this blog, but for our 100th post, could you expect anything else? I'm going to assume for the sake of variety that all these lists are personal preferences, lest we get three instances of The Beatles at #1. Of course, if anyone else is trying to fool themselves by being be objective, then by all means.

Dan's Top 5:
I'm pretty satisfied with this list, having included less than ten songs out of 125 that I don't listen to regularly. I was really considering adding Bowie instead of Pink Floyd, but I had called Floyd my favorite for so long in high school, and Bowie is just too hard to whittle down to five albums.

1. Peter Gabriel




1. Peter Gabriel 3


1. Games Without Frontiers


2. I Don't Remember


3. Biko


4. No Self Control


5. Intruder


2. So


1. Sledgehammer


2. Red Rain


3. In Your Eyes


4. Big Time


5. That Voice Again


3. Peter Gabriel 4


1. Shock The Monkey


2. I Have The Touch


3. The Rhythm of the Heat


4. San Jacinto


5. Lay Your Hands On Me


4. Us


1. Secret World


2. Come Talk To Me


3. Digging In The Dirt


4. Blood of Eden


5. Kiss That Frog


5. Peter Gabriel


1. Solsbury Hill (my favorite song ever, and it's on one of his worst albums. Really, Up deserves to be here. But whatever.)


2. Moribund the Burgermeister


3. Modern Love


4. Down the Dolce Vita


5. Humdrum




2. Muse




1. Black Holes and Revelations


1. Invincible


2. Knights of Cydonia


3. Take A Bow


4. Starlight


5. Supermassive Black Hole


2. Absolution


1. Stockholm Syndrome


2. Butterflies And Hurricanes


3. Hysteria


4. Thoughts of a Dying Atheist


5. Falling Away With You


3. Origin of Symmetry


1. New Born


2. Plug In Baby


3. Bliss


4. Citizen Erased


5. Micro Cuts


4. H.A.A.R.P.


1. Knights of Cydonia (Live)


2. Butterflies And Hurricanes (Live)


3. Stockholm Syndrome (Live)


4. Hysteria (Live)


5. Invincible (Live)


5. Showbiz


1. Showbiz


2. Falling Down


3. Cave


4. Sober


5. Uno




3. Radiohead




1. The Bends


1. My Iron Lung


2. Fake Plastic Trees


3. Street Spirit (Fade Out)


4. Planet Telex


5. Just


2. OK Computer


1. No Surprises


2. Airbag


3. Paranoid Android


4. Karma Police


5. Climbing Up The Walls


3. Hail To The Thief


1. There There. (The Boney King of Nowhere.)


2. A Punchup at a Wedding. (No no no no no no no no.)


3. 2 + 2 = 5 (The Lukewarm.)


4. Where I End and You Begin. (The Sky is Falling In.)


5. Go to Sleep. (Little Man Being Erased.)


4. In Rainbows


1. Reckoner


2. Bodysnatchers


3. Videotape


4. House of Cards


5. Weird Fishes/Arpeggi


5. Kid A - it took me forever to warm up to this album


1. Optimistic


2. Everything In Its Right Place


3. Idioteque


4. The National Anthem


5. Morning Bell




4. Duran Duran




1. Rio


1. Hungry Like The Wolf


2. Rio


3. Save a Prayer


4. Hold Back The Rain


5. The Chauffeur


2. The Wedding Album


1. Ordinary World


2. Come Undone


3. Too Much Information


4. Breath After Breath


5. Love Voodoo


3. Duran Duran


1. Planet Earth


2. Girls on Film


3. Careless Memories


4. Night Boat


5. Anyone Out There


4. Red Carpet Massacre


1. Falling Down


2. Tricked Out


3. Skin Divers


4. Nite Runner


5. Red Carpet Massacre


5. Seven And The Ragged Tiger


1. The Reflex


2. The Union Of The Snake


3. New Moon On Monday


4. Of Crime and Passion (OK, I don't listen to these last two at all. But what am I going to do, say I like Medazzaland?)


5. The Seventh Stranger




5. Pink Floyd




1. The Dark Side of the Moon


1. Brain Damage


2. Eclipse


3. Time


4. Us And Them


5. Money


2. The Wall


1. Comfortably Numb


2. Run Like Hell


3. Nobody Home


4. Another Brick In The Wall, Part 2


5. Mother


3. Wish You Were Here


1. Wish You Were Here


2. Shine On You Crazy Diamond (Parts I - V)


3. Shine On You Crazy Diamond (Parts VI - IX)


4. Have A Cigar


5. Welcome To The Machine


4. Animals


1. Sheep


2. Pigs (Three Different Ones)


3. Dogs


4. Pigs On The Wing (Part One)


5. Pigs On The Wing (Part Two)


5. Meddle


1. Echoes


2. One Of These Days


3. Fearless


4. A Pillow Of Winds


5. San Tropez (I hate this song, but I hate "Seamus" even more.)

Ryan's Top A Lot:

1. The Beatles
   




1. Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
   


1. A Day in the Life (again this song pops up in the #1 spot, maybe it IS my favorite song of all-time, I just don't realize it...)
   


2. Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
   


3. Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds
   


4. Getting Better
   


5. Good Morning Good Morning
   


2. Abbey Road
   


1. Here Comes the Sun
   


2. The End
   


3. I Want You (She's So Heavy)
   


4. Because
   


5. You Never Give Me Your Money (note: ranking these was very difficult, esp. due to my refusal to consider the medley one song...otherwise the medley should be anyone's #1) (other note: Mean Mr. Mustard sounds like it could actually be on Nilsson's "The Point!")
   


3. Magical Mystery Tour
   


1. I Am The Walrus
   


2. Strawberry Fields Forever
   


3. All You Need Is Love
   


4. Hello, Goodbye (my dad's favorite, incidentally)
   


5. Penny Lane
   


4. The Beatles (White Album)
   


1. Happiness is a Warm Gun
   


2. Helter Skelter
   


3. Dear Prudence (I freely admit I have problems ranking #s 2 and 3, see the White Album list and the Top 5 Beatles songs list)
   


4. While My Guitar Gently Weeps
   


5. Back in the U.S.S.R.
   


5. Revolver
   


1. Eleanor Rigby
   


2. Yellow Submarine
   


3. Taxman
   


4. Got To Get You Into My Life
   


5. And Your Bird Can Sing (whew--I don't know what I was expecting with this list, but it is definitely proving a lot more difficult than planned... If The Beatles was that hard, I worry about the projects to come...)
   


2. Harry Nilsson
   




1. The Point!
   


1. Me and My Arrow
   


2. Think About Your Troubles (note: so damn good)
   


3. Everything's Got 'Em
   


4. Poli High
   


5. Life Line
   


2. Aerial Ballet
   


1. Everybody's Talkin'
   


2. Good Old Desk (a personal favorite...oh, right, we're doing a list about this)
   


3. Don't Leave Me (excellent scat)
   


4. Daddy's Song
   


5. One (not really one of my favorite songs, but still good...see Coconut below...I originally ranked Nilsson Schmilsson above Aerial Ballet, until I realized this was simply not the case; anyway, I typed up the rant about Coconut before this rant. I'll stop now.)
   


3. Nilsson Schmilsson


1. The Moonbeam Song


2. Gotta Get Up


3. Without You (really overdone, but this song is still good, damn it)


4. Jump Into The Fire


5. Coconut (admittedly not my favorite Nilsson song, but still a good song...I've downgraded it to 5...this song mainly irritates me because whenever you do a search for Nilsson, anywhere--google, limewire, etc.--this is the first song to pop up. I mean, Nilsson had so many better songs than this one. Meh, whatever.)


4. Harry


1. I Guess The Lord Must Be In New York City
   


2. The Puppy Song
   


3. Mother Nature's Son (per wiki, this was the Beatles' favorite cover of one of their songs)
   


4. Mr. Bojangles
   


5. Nobody Cares About The Railroads Anymore
   


5. Pandemonium Shadow Show
   


1. 1941
   


2. Sleep Late, My Lady Friend
   


3. Without Her
   


4. Cuddly Toy (hmm, here's some random Nilsson song titles: cuddly toy, the puppy song, good old desk, the moonbeam song...in many ways he appeals to the 4-year-old in me)
   


5. You Can't Do That
   




3. Ben Folds/Five (nuts to you if you think this is cheating)
   




1. Whatever and Ever Amen
   


1. Brick
   


2. One Angry Dwarf and 200 Solemn Faces
   


3. Evaporated


4. The Battle Of Who Could Care Less
   


5. Kate
   


2. Ben Folds Five
   


1. Alice Childress
   


2. Philosophy
   


3. Jackson Cannery
   


4. Boxing


5. Julianne
   


3. Rockin' the Suburbs
   


1. Still Fighting It
   


2. Not The Same
   


3. The Luckiest
   


4. Zak and Sara
   


5. Annie Waits
   


4. Naked Baby Photos (this is a compilation CD of previously unreleased tracks, but it has my two favorite BFF songs on it, so I have to include it...see #s 1-2)
   


1. Eddie Walker
   


2. Emaline
   


3. Underground (the best version of it)
   


4. For Those Of Y'All Who Wear Fanny Packs
   


5. Twin Falls
   


5. Songs for Silverman
   


1. Landed
   


2. Time
   


3. Prison Food
   


4. Bastard
   


5. Late (the first of two tributes to Elliot Smith to appear on this list...see BDB below)
   




4. Badly Drawn Boy
   




1. One Plus One Is One
   


1. Four Leaf Clover
   


2. Year of the Rat
   


3. Fewer Words (the other tribute to E.S.)
   


4. Logic Of A Friend
   


5. One Plus One Is One
   


2. About A Boy
   


1. Something To Talk About
   


2. A Minor Incident
   


3. Silent Sigh
   


4. I Love N.Y.E.
   


5. Donna and Blitzen
   


3. The Hour of the Bewilderbeast
   


1. The Shining
   


2. Disillusion
   


3. Once Around The Block
   


4. Pissing In The Wind
   


5. Everybody's Stalking (this song does not sound like a BDB song)
   


4. Born in the U.K.
   


1. Born in the U.K.
   


2. The Time of Times
   


3. Journey from A to B
   


4. Degrees of Separation
   


5. Promises
   


5. Have You Fed The Fish?
   


1. You Were Right
   


2. Born Again
   


3. Have You Fed The Fish?
   


4. All Possibilities
   


5. The Further I Slide
   




5. John Lennon (solo career)
   




1. Imagine
   


1. Imagine
   


2. Oh Yoko!
   


3. Jealous Guy
   


4. How Do You Sleep? (or, "Suck it McCartney!")
   


5. Oh My Love
   


2. John Lennon/Plastic Ono Band
   


1. God
   


2. Working Class Hero (he says "fuck" twice. Cool.)
   


3. Mother
   


4. Isolation (hey, according to wiki, this is one of Roger Waters' favorite songs of all-time)
   


5. Remember (man this song takes me back to my Lennon obsession in high school)
   


3. Mind Games
   


1. Meat City
   


2. Mind Games (as sung by Kevin Spacey.) (maybe not.)
   


3. Tight A$
   


4. Aisumasen (I'm Sorry)
   


5. Bring on the Lucie (Freeda People)
   


4. Double Fantasy
   


1. Watching the Wheels
   


2. (Just Like) Starting Over
   


3. Beautiful Boy (Darling Boy) (has "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans" in it)
   


4. Woman
   


5. I'm Losing You
   


5. Rock 'n' Roll
   


1. Stand By Me
   


2. Be-Bop-A-Lula
   


3. Rip It Up/Ready Teddy
   


4. Ain't That A Shame
   


5. Peggy Sue
   

Tim's Top 5:

Given that the formatting would take forever, in part because I'm down to typing with six fingers and because it's blurring lines together, I'm forsaking it for now.

I. The Beatles –

A. Abbey Road
1. Polythene Pam
2. Something
3. Here Comes The Sun
4. You Never Give Me Your Money
5. Golden Slumbers

B. Revolver
1. Taxman
2. Tomorrow Never Knows
3. She Said She Said
4. Eleanor Rigby
5. Got to Get You Into My Life

C. Rubber Soul
1. Run For Your Life
2. In My Life
3. Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown)
4. You Won’t See Me
5. The Word

D. Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band
1. Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (reprise)
2. A Day in the Life
3. Lovely Rita
4. Getting Better
5. Good Morning Good Morning

E. A Hard Day’s Night
1. Things We Said Today
2. Can’t Buy Me Love
3. A Hard Day’s Night
4. You Can’t Do That
5. If I Fell

II. Pearl Jam –

A. Yield
1. Faithful
2. Wish List
3. In Hiding
4. Given To Fly
5. Brain of J.

B. Vs.
1. Elderly Woman Behind The Counter In A Small Town
2. Rearviewmirror
3. Glorified G
4. Daughter
5. Animal

C. Riot Act
1. Save You
2. Love Boat Captain
3. I Am Mine
4. Thumbing My Way
5. Can’t Keep

D. Vitalogy
1. Corduroy
2. Not For You
3. Spin the Black Circle
4. Last Exit
5. Immortality

E. Pearl Jam
1. Life Wasted
2. Gone
3. World Wide Suicide
4. Come Back
5. Severed Hand

III. Bruce Springsteen –

A. Born to Run
1. Thunder Road
2. Born to Run
3. Backstreets
4. Jungleland
5. Tenth Avenue Freeze Out

B. The Rising
1. Lonesome Day
2. The Rising
3. Worlds Apart
4. Into the Fire
5. Mary’s Place

C. Darkness on the Edge of Town
1. The Promised Land
2. Darkness on the Edge of Town
3. Prove It All Night
4. Badlands
5. Adam Raised a Cain

D. Born In The U.S.A.
1. No Surrender
2. Darlington County
3. My Hometown
4. Bobby Jean
5. Glory Days

E. The River
1. The Ties That Bind
2. Independence Day
3. The River
4. You Can Look (But You Better Not Touch)
5. Out in the Street

IV. Elliott Smith

A. Figure 8
1. Stupidity Tries
2. Son of Sam
3. Everything Reminds Me Of Her
4. Pretty Mary K
5. Junk Bond Trader

B. Either/Or
1. Ballad of Big Nothing
2. Pictures of Me
3. Speed Trials
4. Between the Bars
5. Alameda

C. XO
1. Waltz #2 (XO)
2. Bled White
3. Independence Day
4. Baby Britain
5. Bottle Up and Explode!

D. From A Basement on a Hill
1. Pretty (Ugly Before)
2. Coast to Coast
3. A Distorted Reality Is Now A Necessity To Be Free
4. A Fond Farewell
5. Shooting Star

E. Roman Candle
1. No Name #1
2. Condor Ave.
3. No Name #3
4. Roman Candle
5. Last Call

V. Guided by Voices

A. Mag Earwhig!
1. I Am A Tree
2. Jane of the Waking Universe
3. Portable Men’s Society
4. Can’t Hear the Revolution
5. Bulldog Skin

B. Isolation Drills
1. The Brides Have Hit Glass
2. Fair Touching
3. Twilight Campfighter
4. Skills Like This
5. Chasing Heather Crazy

C. Bee Thousand
1. Tractor Rape Chain
2. Echos Myron
3. Smothered in Hugs
4. I Am A Scientist
5. Gold Star For Robot Boy

D. Alien Lanes
1. Game of Pricks
2. Watch Me Jumpstart
3. A Salty Salute
4. Blimps Go 90
5. My Valuable Hunting Knife

E. Under the Bushes Under the Stars
1.Cut Out Witch
2. Don’t Stop Now
3. The Official Ironman Rallying Song
4. Underwater Explosions
5. Your Name Is Wild

Top 5 Nonexistent Bands (That You Wanted to Start)

OK. This is a bit of an awkward list, and I referenced it in my Beatles top 5. It's a bit surreal (as far as this blog is concerned,) but I hope most people can relate. The idea behind it is through the course of listening to music (and writing) one dreams about the bands they could be in. So, it's the top five bands you personally wanted to start (whether through producing them, being the front man as a guitarist, vocalist, whatever.)

Tory's Top 5:

1. The Unnameable - This is my most recent idea, and a band I would actually like to start. I have written plenty of lyrics for it, but it's a matter of finding a couple of guys to go along with everything it deals with. Prog-rock by the simplest definition, but as far as the myspace heading would be it would read Prog Rock / Blues / Folk. The lyrics are mostly topical in nature ie political (Rage Against the Machine being the biggest influence here,) Religious (my own beliefs,) and environmental (my fear of global warming is a big influence here. To list the influences would be too long of a top 5.

2. Tory Fox, All By Himself - For the majority of my writing life, the sonsg I have written have been in the nature of love songs. The biggest influences of thie sband are Bright Eyes and Damien Rice, with a couple other acoustic/singer-songwriter musicians there. The idea behind the band is noted in the title. Me. All by myself with an acoustic guitar and that is all. This band could legitimately take off if I were to learn how to play the guitar well.

3. Awaiting the Moment - This isn't a band that I myself wanted to actually participate in. However, it is a band that I did want to produce. Originally they were created when I first discovered how to make a webpage with geocities. I was there biggest fan, and no one else in high school knew about them. I made sure that everyone heard of them (because hearing them was an impossibility.) The website may still be up: www.geocities.com/awaitingthemoment. On just checking, no it isn't up. Shucks. This local Va Beach hardcore band (originally from Kansas before relocating) did make it into the script of a mockumentary with them as the stars.

4. untitled band - This band never actually made it to the naming part, but the whole theory behind the band was constructed. Lyrically, the band's influences draw from Slipknot and other death metal bands - essentially really violent songs about murder and whatnot. Musically, the band was going to be an amalgum of distorted 7-string guitars, acoustic guitars, scratchboards, keyboards, synths and of course precussion. They were classified as nu-emo death-electro.

5. Slaves on Strike - Another band that didn't make it too far. It was going to be a band heavily influenced by Rage Against the Machine. As the name says it is obviously a politics-driven band. The singing style was up in the air, as a rap-rock mentality would've been straight stealing from RATM. The farthest I did get with this band was the CD cover art of the first album Geurillas In the Streets. This was the epitome of my Angry White Boy phase.

Dan's Top 5:

1. Me, Huy, and Matt - Basically, two friends and I wanted to make really, really good music based around songwriting, a la Radiohead or Ambulance LTD. We probably had the talent, and we definitely had the drive. The only problem was we had scheduling problems with Matt, who was constantly working. Matt especially gets bonus points because he's actually British, which would have guaranteed our success.

2. Rex Bedlam - This is actually the first and only band I was actually in. It did get started, obviously, so I feel I shouldn't put it at #1. I played bass, and we had a really talented songwriter, lead guitarist, and keyboardist. And whoever was our drummer was usually pretty talented too, but because of scheduling problems with him, the band fell apart just as things were starting to take off. If we ever reunite, though, you'd be best to come to one of our gigs. God knows how many there will be.

3. All Kinds Of Gravity - This is actually a very good Blacksburg band that exists. (Check them out on Myspace.) I co-judged the Rock Music Club's Battle of the Bands in the Spring semester, and this band won it all, including help towards recording a demo. I include them here because of their unique sound - it's something that I would like to try to capture as a producer/engineer, and I suspect that whoever's in the studio behind the mixing board isn't doing it right. I was there from their first gig.

4. Quality Jones - Essentially, this is the band that I want to lead, and this is the band name that I will use. I'm still not even sure whether I'll play bass or guitar, but I will be the primary songwriter. Currently, thanks to how awesome Muse is, I would probably try to take it in the direction of progressive rock, with some additional songwriting kudos to my old heroes Pink Floyd.

5. Phoenix 17 - Another band name from when I was first learning guitar and coming up with my own riffs. Looking back on them, the song ideas were pretty simplistic and not that entertaining, so it would be safe to say that this band would suck. However, the guitar tone would be amazing.

Honorable Mention: I guess if I were an acoustic singer/songwriter.

Top 5 Geographical Bands

This is Ryan's idea originally, after he was cleaning out his iPod and wondering what Chicago songs he should keep. Or maybe we thought of it together after we were talking about how Kansas really isn't worth seeing in concert. At any rate, these are the Top 5 bands with geographical names. In the name of purity, I have used bands that use only the names of places as the entire band name, but if you struggle to find any good bands (there really aren't many), then I guess that rule is not set in stone.

Dan's Top 5:

1. Boston - Not only the makers of one of the best debut albums ever - actually, the best-selling debut album in U.S. history, this band also invented (and its members are the only acceptable wearers of) the white-guy 'fro. The genius of this band comes primarily from Tom Scholz, who wrote all the songs, invented their signature guitar tone by designing his own equipment, produced their work, and also freed the slaves and saved humanity. Needless to say, I like Boston.

2. Kansas - If there was ever a sign that there aren't many good Geographical Bands, it's the fact that Kansas wins the #2 spot. To their credit, they have three cool songs ("Dust In The Wind," "Point of Know Return," and "Carry On Wayward Son") There may be more, but these are the three that receive massive airplay. It speaks volumes that I'm nowhere near willing to pay $50 to see them play in State College. But if you've ever played "Carry On Wayward Son" on Guitar Hero, you know how much those songs I listed do rock.

3. Asia - I'm going to submit to my love of Prog Rock yet again, putting Asia at #3 despite only knowing a single song, "Heat of the Moment." This band incorporated members of former prog mega-bands Yes and E.L.P., so they're definitely a supergroup. But whenever I think of the musical connections of Asia, it never escapes me that the keyboardist, Geoff Downes, was also the keyboardist for The Buggles (yes, the same Buggles of "Video Killed The Radio Star" fame). Apparently he was once entered into the Guinness Book of Records for using the most (28) keyboards on stage during one performance. I should really get around to listening to at least a second song from these guys.

4. Chicago - "25 or 6 to 4" is by far the best song this band ever did, as it's the only song I can really remember that features their guitar player, who was actually pretty good. (Sadly, I watched VH1's Behind The Music episode on Chicago. I mean, that's sad in and of itself, but even more sad was that the episode revealed that their guitar player accidentally committed suicide.) "Saturday in the Park" is another acceptable tune, but my second-favorite is "You're The Inspiration." Why? Because when I first heard it, my guess was that the Bee Gees were singing it. Kudos to you, Peter Cetera, for pulling that aural illusion off.

5. Europe - "The Final Countdown" was huge - #1 in 26 countries, and to this day a pretty decent song to pump up to before a sports entrance. Hey wait, this band was primarily a metal band? For shame, Europe, for shame! Actually, Europe had the same reaction to that hit album, The Final Countdown, thinking it was way too keyboard-driven. They took the reins on the next album, adding more guitars and getting the sound they wanted, but never achieved the same sort of success, succumbing to one-hit-wonder syndrome (a serious disease that is sometimes fatal).

Ryan's Top 5:

Man, my list sucks. Why did we have this idea?

1. New York Dolls - A great protopunk band that influenced greater bands: The Clash, The Sex Pistols, The Ramones, etc.

2. Kansas - I can't help but love them for nostalgic reasons. I really have no concept if they are actually a good band or not. (See: Meat Loaf.) Apparently their members are from Topeka and Manhattan respectively...not two of my favorite towns. Ah well.

3. Boston - I have "more than a feeling" that I'm copping out and stealing Dan's entries. Ha! Ha! Ha!

4. Europe - "Doo-duh-loo-doo! Doo-duh-loo-doo-doo!"

5. Asia - I know very little about Asia, but they have one key fact going for them: they're not Chicago. Welcome to the Top 5, my Asiatic friends. (Bonus points for Cartman's rendition of "Heat of the Moment.")

Tory's Top 5:

1. Cypress Hill - Granted I don't listen to a lot of Cypress Hill, but I am attempting to be different with this list. And, frankly, I would probably listen to Cypress Hill over Boston or Kansas.

2. The Mars Volta - I wanted to put them number 1, but I don't think their name is exactly in the tune. That being said Mars - the planet - does have a lot of geographical stuff going on ... like the TALLEST MOUNTAIN (or volcano) IN THE UNIVERSE.

3. Evergreen Terrace - A really amazing hardcore band that (from what I remember) only does hardcore covers (Sunday Bloody Sunday being the only song that comes to mind.) Also, they are named after a fictional geographical location. From the Simpsons no less.

4. America - Horse With No Name.

5. E Street Band - They are on here because they played a lot with the Boss. However, I've never heard them independently, therefore they are number five.

Honorable Mentions: Rammstein, Sugarland, Walls of Jericho - it should be noted that these bands are being honorably mentioned for having names that reflect geographic locations.

Tim's Top 5:

One could argue Nirvana qualifies. I won't, though, since that's way too easy.

1. Europe - As far as I'm concerned, they released one album, which consists of ten recordings of one song. But man, I loved that song when I was five, which means that, along with "One Stop Along The Way (The Ballad of Johnny bench)" by Terry Cashman I am forever cursed to continue loving the song. It invokes good memories of my favorite television character ever (Gob Bluth), hockey games (it was a theme for the Omaha Lancers for a long time), and what good synthesizers have brought to society (surprisingly little). Still, should my elbow ever manage to repair itself so I can throw without my arm going numb and should I suddenly add thirty miles to my fastball, I'm pretty sure this song would be on the shortlist of songs that would play as I entered the game (which is itself a list that I'll be posting at some point once I've refined mine to perfection, since it's one of the few lists about which I will care vehemently).

2. The Bronx - I don't know anything of their work, but The Bronx is a place, and the one song I own of theirs ("Around the Horn [Louis XIV remix]" from the soundtrack to Snakes on a Plane) is pretty above average for throwaway soundtrack fare.

3. America - I think they really warrant being somewhere in the pit of hell, because for at least an entire day last week, I had "Sister Goldenhair" stuck in my head. Not to say this to ruin my presidential campaign in 2016, but let it be said once and for all that I really truly hate America (in band form). In book form, I approve of it, and it is not actually a country...since we're the United States and America represents a land mass spanning from Canada to Argentina. But that's still a place. I win.

4. Kansas - I cannot repeat enough that I don't like Kansas, but Carry On Wayward Son and Dust In The Wind always get me to listen anyway (because Carry On wayward Son isn't a bad song and because Dust In The Wind makes me think of Old School...and songs from Old School invariably get me to listen to them in a fashion that I hope is ironic.

5. Alabama - Ok, I don't like their music, I just like any country music band that has the balls to hate Ronald Reagan. "40 Hour Week (for a livin')" might not be a call to revolution, but it's enough of a screw you to the fervent anti-Union and anti-laborer administration that helped destroy America's trade surplus and turn us into a nation that can't rely on itself for anything. I seem to remember that Alabama sucked less than most country bands, but I can't say for certain, because other than the aforementioned song, I don't remember any of their work.

Honorable mention: I don't hate Chicago, though I can't say I like them.

Dishonorable mention: I do hate Boston.

Top 5 Favorite Bands/Artists Circa 1995

Here's a list that precludes any apologizing--the top five bands that you were into in 1995. In other words, imagine you are doing a Top 5 Bands/Artists list of all-time--as your 1995 self.

Ryan's Top Five

1. Smashing Pumpkins - Around this time, I was dead-convinced that 1979 was as good as a song could get, and I was in love with the video. For videos, see also "Tonight Tonight," which may be the greatest music video ever made. "Bullet with Butterfly Wings" really captured that angst I was feeling...and by "angst" I mean a predilection for playing rock music with cool lyrics very loudly. See also "Zero," which still is the one of the best songs to play when you're angry (thank you, Baker).

2. Green Day - Enamored with "Dookie," I acquired (my mom bought) "Insomniac" without hearing any of the music, which is a rare thing nowadays (thenadays?). I remember playing "Brain Stew/Jaded" quite loudly, on one occasion getting my grandma to remark, "This isn't music." For a 12-year-old, I felt pretty empowered with my righteous rebelliousness. Of course, I was overlooking the fact that I owned CDs by: Hootie and the Blowfish, the Rembrandts, and Sheryl fucking Crow. Anyway, I really loved Green Day at this point in my life, and they've successfully done everything to destroy that relationship since.

3. Offspring - Oh man, did I ever love "Smash." The song "Self Esteem" epitomizes my infatuation with playing rock loudly, and to this day I can't pass it on the radio without turning the volume up to 11 and singing along. I also bought their prior albums without hearing any of the music and, well, ... I can't recall a track.

4. Oasis - Ranking Oasis behind Offspring is painful even if this list has little to do with objective awesomeness. Anyway, the two big songs I was obsessed with from this album were "Wonderwall" (still great) and "Champagne Supernova" (I don't really need to hear it anymore). I was not that into "Don't Look Back in Anger," which for some reason I heard again in 2000 and fell in love with.

5. Weezer - Here's the thing: I loved the blue album, but I didn't really get into all of it until later in life. This was the first album I ever got, and I was still very much single-track-minded; when I found a single I liked, I honed in on it to an extreme fault. Thus, in 1995 I listened "Buddy Holly," "The Sweater Song," and "No One Else" way too much, and other (better) songs like "Only in Dreams" and "My Name is Jonas" not as much.

Honorable: Red Hot Chili Peppers, Weird Al Yankovic, and it feels like I'm probably leaving some folk out... I think I've pretty much nailed this list though.

Dan's Top 5:

This is actually extremely hard, since I did not even get into popular music until 1999, and even then I was only into classic rock. It took a long time before I became a fan of more modern artists. That said, I'm going to turn back the clock a bit and list a few bands that were popular at the time, as well as some of my early favorites from my beginnings in '99.

1. Van Halen - Oh my god, have you heard Eddie Van Halen play the guitar? Van Halen will always hold a special place in my heart as the first rock band I really liked. For a hard rock band, they were really pretty original during the early David Lee Roth years. There were a lot of different swing and jazz influences when it came to song structure and style, and there was an undeniable sense of humor in their performances. As much as I've worn out their songs in my head, there's still a pretty good chance that I won't skip over them in my music library.

2. Pink Floyd - I remember when I first listened to The Wall. It actually really freaked me out, the way Trainspotting did. Beyond serving as my personal introduction to the concept of concept albums, Pink Floyd really became the first band I really took ownership of. i considered them visionaries, and I still love the band to this day.

3. Weezer - By 1995, only the Blue album had been released, so I have to factor in my would-be impression that Weezer would continue with such greatness. Apart from a few Pinkerton and Maladroit songs, however, this turned out to not be the case. Still, since I consider that album one of the finest of the 90's, I imagine it would have had a significant impact on my by this point.

4. Blur - I'm assuming I would have been able to find out about Parklife in '94, and subsequently hail it as the best thing to hit music since the decade started. I would have had to rely on the Internet, though, and I can't remember if I had access to it back then. Anyway, that album kicked ass and it sold me on Blur.

5. R.E.M. - I still don't know this band well, but I imagine that if I were into music in 1995, they would be one of my top 5. Man on the Moon is one of my favorite songs, albeit pretty much the only R.E.M. song I know apart from their biggest radio hits. I imagine that if I bothered to collect the rest of their albums, I could find something good on all of them, even though this is just intuition talking.

Honorable Mentions: Probably everything Ryan mentioned with exception of Offspring.

Tim's Top 5:
This is kind of difficult, because I really remember my taste in 7th grade (shudder) and I remember my taste once I was forced to fend for myself when I started college (whew). In between, not so much. Apparently, however, a couple of the answers are easy. Really, given that I had a brother four years older than me, the better title for my list would be "Things My Brother Was Into and I Followed Him Into"...

Frankly, I don't recall Oasis - What's The Story (Morning Glory) or Smashing Pumpkins' Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness until 1996 (which is when I saw The Smashing Pumpkins at my first ever concert...but apparently both were released in 1995, or so ITunes tells me.

My list isn't really my idea of the top 5 bands of all time circa 1995, but they were the people I was listening to. Hell, I know The Beatles are better than The Dead Kennedys, but just ask me which I've listened to in the last few months.

1) R.E.M. - This was one of the few spillovers from junior high that hung around. I still think Monster is their second best album ever, and Automatic For the People was the highlight, so it's not hard to defend R.E.M. fanhood. They would then go on to release Up, and there was no reason to fear for the future. Then they released Reveal and there was no reason to forgive.

2) Matthew Sweet - Well, well, well, the truth comes out. It's not really a guilty pleasure because his work after In Reverse is a sheer house of horrors, and I can argue in favor of both 100% Fun and Girlfriend. But really it came just as much from a hyper-pop sensibility merged with my newfound arrival in Nebraska which really required you to support local artists...and it was either Matthew Sweet or 311 and Blue Moon Ghetto. Lord, be glad I chose Matthew Sweet.

3) John Lennon - The John Lennon Collection was the first album in my BMG investment of my freshman year and I listened to it relentlessly. I didn't get into the Beatles full-on until 1996, but I'm pretty sure this album was in the collection in 1995 and predated my full British invasion investment since the Who and The Sex Pistols would follow in ensuing months. The single greatest hits album was like a gateway drug to good taste, and all the albums I owned before it can't take that away.

4) Oasis - I was still hung up on Rock 'n' Roll Star from Definitely Maybe, and I got really hooked on a very emo-ish Don't Look Back In Anger somewhere around this time, and I definitely followed my brother hook, line, and sinker into Oasis. Oddly enough, though, I never bought the album. I still don't own it...and I own Heathen Chemistry and The Masterplan. I'm not entirely sure whether it was really 1995 that Oasis made it impossible to ignore them, but it was close enough to count them.

5) Gin Blossoms - I'd like to pretend I could put Guided by Voices or Pavement into this spot and get some indie street cred, but it'd be a total lie. I was four years away from getting any genuine interest in those bands, so it's got to be Gin Blossoms. At the time, I'd had maybe three sips of alcohol, but apparently I had optimistic views of potential future alcoholism and loved the relentlessly bleak pop sensibilities of New Miserable Experience. I liked Weezer's songs on the radio, but didn't buy the Blue album until a year or two later, Nirvana's Unplugged in New York didn't make it into the rotation of albums I'd get obsessed with until the last month of my freshman year, and I had just moved, so I was really finding my footing in Nebraska and didn't have time to develop good taste. At least that's my story.

Not-at-all Honorable mention: definitely Weird Al Yankovic, Foo Fighters, U2, yikes...Genesis, Inner Circle? I really liked fake reggae when I moved, but only reggae that clearly distanced themselves from any sort of drug use (my relentless hatred for frat boys was preordained)

Top 5 Current Favorite Bands/Artists

Defined however you like, but within reason...though The Rolling Stones may technically tour again, for example, I wouldn't rate them here. (Not only for that reason, but you get the idea.) Ditto Paul McCartney. I guess what I'm trying to say is, no old folk. Ben Folds would probably be the oldest on my list.

P.S., Stole this idea from Tory, who had it a while back.

1. Badly Drawn Boy - It's actually kind of difficult for me to explain my love affair with Badly Drawn Boy. More than any other artist, he makes albums before songs. I listened to One Plus One Is One a few times and couldn't find many memorable singles, but upon repeated listens, I began to love every individual track for its contribution to the whole. My favorite songs: "Four Leaf Clover," "The Shining," "Minor Incident," "Something to Talk About," "Born in the UK," "Silent Sigh," "Fewer Words," et. al.

2. Muse - Feels wrong ranking them this low because they kick so much ass. I guess, if they follow Black Holes up with something close to as awesome, they might be my favorite band of all-time.

3. Ben Folds - In the long run I like Ben Folds more than almost everyone else, of course, but if I'm being truthful to the "current" point, I have to put him third.

4. The Decemberists - OK, now I feel comfortable ranking them, after legally (in an illegal sort of way) getting their albums online. I've listened to The Crane Wife in one of those patented ryan-obsessive sort of Musey, Badly Drawny Boyey-type ways lately. Everyone had successfully convinced me that they were lyrically talented, but what's taken me by surprise is their musicality. These songs rock--try listening to "The Perfect Crime 2" without jamming.

5. Sufjan Stevens - Narrowly defeats The Flaming Lips, probably because At War With The Mystics wasn't as good as Yoshimi (a really tall order). I'm in love with Illinoise. I've never thought of seriously using this adjective, but his lyrics really are "haunting." It takes some talent to pull off a mournful song about John Wayne Gacy and make it personally relevant ("And in my best behavior, I am really just like him / Look beneath the floorboards for the secrets I have hid").

Honorables: The Flaming Lips, Gnarls Barkley (like Muse, a good follow-up would affect their rank), Coldplay ("You know why you're gay? Because you like Coldplay."), Fiona Apple

Dan's Top 5:

I'm going to interpret this as both "bands that are active" as well as "bands that I've been listening to within the last month or so." That's the only way I'm going to be able to narrow it down to 5.

1. Muse - Dan's Musefest 2007 is about out of gas, as I've been listening to Muse for quite some time. However, with GH III coming out and featuring Knights of Cydonia, I will most likely again take up listening to them nonstop, while being quick to point out that "I was into them before GH III came out."

2. The Decemberists - Probably the band for which I have to do the most listening work, but I'm really looking forward to it. I only "know" about a handful of songs, but I've never heard one that I dislike.

3. Damon Albarn's Latest Project - I figure this includes Blur (recently reunited), Gorillaz, and The Good The Bad & The Queen. I've listened to every "artist," and they're all good. I'm looking forward to whatever he releases next, and I'm almost guaranteed to buy it without listening to it first (which is what I did for TGTB&TQ).

4. Belle & Sebastian - This is only based off one album, but it was good enough for me to probably get their next one, whenever it's released.

5. Starsailor - I have two albums, but in all honesty have only listened to three songs. Again, they're a band I like, but I just need ot work on getting to know them.

Honorable Mentions: Radiohead (only unranked because they've had no new album in a while), The Go! Team, Doves, Gnarls Barkley

Tim's Top 5:
Having now taken a solid nine months to respond to this, I have a little more hindsight to celebrate, but oh well. That said, I don't think my list will have changed. Since my initial list all involved bands who had put out fewer than three albums except The Old 97's, I've just decided to set that limit.

1. Franz Ferdinand - They may never release a third album, but I'm so enamored with the first two that they still make the top 5. They're British, they're good with writing lyrics and making references to things that make me feel British (ah, Terry Wogen, how you make me feel British)

2. OK Go - I love these guys. I don't care about the videos that got everyone into the band, it took me forever to appreciate them on any level, but now that I do, I'm hooked. Oh No is one of my favorite albums of the last decade, and their debut has a few songs that I consider indispensable. Throw in the connection to NPR and attempting to dethrone Bush...and I can't believe I'm putting them at 3.

3. Arctic Monkeys - Both their debut album and the follow up are dynamite albums and they've already mastered the art of the non-album single with "Leave Before the Lights Come On". They're not strictly a singles band, which makes them absolutely essential to this list.

4. The Killers - All right, I gave up on Sam's Town, only to come around and find it to be a masterpiece, even if it's not Hot Fuss. Sawdust was underwhelming, but they're a young band to be putting out a B-sides disc, and it still has some very solid material. Hot Fuss is one of the most consistently great albums of the decade and Sam's Town has some indispensable tracks, including the title track and Bones.

5. Nine Black Alps - Their first album is a masterpiece, one of the best things Rob Schnapf has ever done, and he's one of the greatest producers of all time (see earlier list). The second album is less wonderful, but still quite good.

Honorable mention: The Decemberists have put out more than three, hence they don't get #5, but they still should count. Kanye West, though he loses me more with each album. The Bravery's last album would get mention, but I didn't think much of their debut. Interpol interests me. The bands I would have put in here don't seem "current" enough -- The Old 97's are almost as old as Pearl Jam, Jay-Z is old, Muse isn't that old, but they've put out five albums, Death Cab is pretty vintage, even if I didn't get into them until Plans.

Top 5 Surviving Bands

This list is of the best bands that have carried on with good music after one or more of their founders left the band for one of a myriad of reasons (e.g. creative differences, solo ambitions, or death). To give you a good example of what I'm after, I'm not going to be listing Weezer on this list, as in my opinion, all their good music came before Matt Sharp left following Pinkerton. Similarly, the Who never recovered from losing Kieth Moon. For the sake of history, I'll also list who left the bands and why.

Dan's Top 5:

1. Pink Floyd (Syd Barrett, mental problems and drug use) - Pink Floyd is probably the oddest choice I could make, as a majority of their success (both commercially and artistically) comes from songs that were almost directly related to Syd Barrett. So, in essence, the Barrett split defined the band. The most notable of these songs, in my opinion, is the epic "Shine On You Crazy Diamond."

2. Duran Duran (Roger Taylor, retirement, and Andy Taylor, solo career) - In my opinion, the New Duran Duran trio made one of the best pop albums of the 90's in the form of The Wedding Album. Even though the rest of their work is sub-par when compared to before the split, "Come Undone" and "Ordinary World" are just too good, not to mention "Too Much Information." The band would reunite in 2005 for one album before Andy left again in 2006.

3. Genesis (Peter Gabriel, brilliant solo career, Steve Hackett, creative differences) - Really, though this band went through tons of lineup changes, there are two distinct eras - The one with Collins, Rutherford, and Banks, and the earlier one that also included Gabriel and Hackett. The five-member Genesis was extremely artistic, Theatrical Victorian Prog Rock, while the three-member Genesis was the band that produced great 80's pop (see Invisible Touch). Both were amazing, so the band deserves this spot.

4. Van Halen (David Lee Roth, solo career) - The reasons why Diamond Dave split are still debated, but Sammy Hagar took over and led the band (or followed Eddie Van Halen's lead) into more pop-oriented waters. The thing is, it was still good music. 5150 was the first Hagar album as well as their first #1 album, and deservedly so. Gary Cherone sucked, though.

5. AC/DC (Bon Scott, death) - After Brian Johnson joined, they released Back in Black partially in tribute to Bon scott, and that went on to be one of the best-selling albums of all time. However, nothing apart from "Thunderstruck" has really been too good since.

Honorable mentions: The Rolling Stones (I'm sure someone else will put them, so I wasn't worried), The Yardbirds, Smashing Pumpkins

Ryan's Top Five

1. Red Hot Chili Peppers - This is the only band that came to mind at first, so I'll go with it. They lost Hillel Slovak and then went on to produce some of the best music of the (early-mid) 90s. Tory and I, I'm pretty sure, are maybe the only two people who like One Hot Minute more than Blood Sugar Sex Magik.

2. The Flaming Lips - Um, they had quite a few members over the years before they made their two best albums, The Soft Bulletin, and Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots.

3. The Verve - Had a lot of turmoil before Urban Hymns, which, as I pointed previously, is one of the best albums of the 90s. Of course, they've never been as good since, but still. Actually, upon further review, the band broke up before this album, then guitarist Nick McCabe returned to record this album, and then they broke up again. So, I'm keeping it here, because the spirit of turmoil was so determined and admirable.

4. AC/DC - See Dan's entry, Back in Black was by far their best.

5. Pink Floyd - I slot them this low because I really like Syd Barrett's stuff.

I'm out.

Tim's Top 5:
1. Guided by Voices - (Tobin Sprout, Jim Pollard, Greg Demos, Jim McPherson...everyone who was ever in the band aside from Bob Pollard at some point...) This band went through dozens of lineups, but at the core, it remained solid, so that my favorite album of GbV's featured a lineup that would appear on no others (though Doug Gillard remained an integral part until the end).

2. The Ramones - (I can't go through the whole list, I'm not that much of a fan) There were eight of them, their music is, to me, relatively indistinguishable for most of their existence, I don't long for the presence of any particular members of the Ramones. This is all I have to say about the Ramones right now.

3. Pearl Jam - (a Spinal Tap-ish collection of drummers -- Dave Krusen, Matt Chamberlain, Dave Abbruzzese, Jack Irons -- a popular mention on this list) - Granted, it's a drummer, few bands (Zeppelin, The Who) would have been brought down by the loss of a drummer. That said, it's also a ton of drummers. And it's had no impact. Ten is still Pearl Jam's worst album, Matt Cameron is their best drummer, although Jack Irons was certainly sufficient.

4. Oasis - (Tony McCarroll after Definitely Maybe, Bonehead and Guigsy after Be Here Now, Alan White after Heathen Chemistry) -- Again, two of these were drummers, but it counts. They're not a great band anymore, but their albums continue to be better than they'll get credit for from the jaded Americans who seem to have grown skeptical of British acts. Heathen Chemistry and Don't Believe the Truth are both far better than advertised, and Standing on the Shoulder of Giants is a better album than anyone really remembers.

5. OK Go - (Andy Duncan, this is purely theoretical) Duncan left after they finished recording Oh No, so his replacement has not appeared on any albums, but they were good live after Duncan left, so I therefore can conclude that his loss will be negligible. I really have no contribution to offer to this Top 5 list whatsoever.

Frankly, I'd do far better with bands that utterly collapsed after a personnel shift (Chris Bell-less Big Star would top the list)

Top 5 Most Overrated Bands

Everyone knows that there are bands out there that are good, but that quite a few people put far too much stock into them. This is what this list is all about, those bands that we know don't deserve the praise they get. You can take it as you like, but this list is different than one such as worst bands. That is why you won't see someone like Britney Spears in here; while she is overrated, she has no musical ability to speak of so it is a travesty that she is even rated.

Tory's Top 5:

1. Nirvana - As I said, these bands are good. But come on, is Nirvana really that good. Yes, they inspired or pioneered the grunge genre, but just because they were the first doesn't mean that they are the greatest. See some lyrics such as Polly and Lake of Fire to see what I am talking about. I feel that their popularity was helped by the apparent suicide of Cobain, but alas, so was the musical community as the true musician (Grohl) was able to come about and form Foo Fighters, a far superior band.

2. Aerosmith - Joe Perry is an excellent guitarist. Steven Tyler is not an equally good singer. There are songs that I think really thrive, but then there are songs when Tyler does his rap-rock type singing that make me want to vomit ie Sweet Emotion.

3. U2 - I do not like this band that is on my list. They are trite. The Joshua Tree was not an epiphany in history of music. Plus their recent music has been some of the best

4. Green Day - Since Dookie, and really up til Dookie, they offered nothing close to the praise they earn. I suppose Insomniac had a decent playlist, and Nimrod had one good song, but with the recent pointless release of American Idiot, some of the worst political satire or commentary or whatever it is supposed to be, they have shown that the days in which they were a relatively accessible band are gone.

5. RHCP - Probably the best band that is on this list. I understand the majority of people liking them, but there are those that seem to equate this band to a modern day Zeppelin (perhaps not that high of quality, but within a nearby echelon at least.) Their music has seemed to get incredibly boring and repetitive; they did have their days though with Blood Sugar Sex Magic and One Hot Minute.

Dan's (Altered) Top 5:

1. Metallica - Pretty much nothing by this band is good. And they have the audacity to call themselves "metal?" I'm not as much of a metal fan as some friends of mine, but I do know that Metallica sucks when compared to some of the bands I've heard them play on their car stereos.

2. The Grateful Dead - I really haven't heard anything I like from them, and I have a predisposition to not liking "jam" bands (Dispatch excluded). How they got one of the biggest followings ever is beyond me. In essence, I guess they're not bad, but they're also not as spectacular as countless bumper stickers lead me to believe.

3. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Everything since Blood Sugar Sex Magik has been bland and mediocre at best. Their career is the ultimate fade-away, going from songs like "Catholic School Girls Rule" and "Stone Cold Bush" to a rip-off of Tom Petty in the form of "Dani California." Interestingly enough, as the uniqueness of the music decreases, the popularity grows.

4. Pearl Jam - I haven't really heard anything by this band that I really like, and they're being equated with Nirvana? Vedder's voice is too caustic, and the music itself seems fairly bland and uninspiring. Speaking of Nirvana, though...

5. Nirvana - I do like a few of their songs, and Nevermind was damn good. But many people call them the best band of the 90's, which is simply wrong. Bonus artistic merit points for a suicide ending, but you lose points tenfold for the fact that Courtney Love is still around.

Honorable mentions: Bob Dylan (not a band - the only reason he didn't make the list), Aerosmith, Nickelback, My Chemical Romance, Panic! At The Disco, Fall Out Boy (these last four are all overrated, but unfortunately they all suck too much for inclusion.)

Ryan's Top Five

This will be a quick one for me because I'm tired--of course, though, bad bands inspire me.

1. Metallica - They've had a few good songs. Get over it. Does anyone else have trouble meeting a Metallica fan who doesn't think they're not better than The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, and The Who combined? Also, Lars Ulrich is one of the biggest douches in the music industry.

2. The Doors/Jim Morrison - I like some their singles all right, has anyone else heard anything mindblowing? "When You're Strange" is a forgettable "classic." I once saw a poster that had Jim Morrison next to Hendrix and Lennon, billed as the "gods of rock." Give me a break.

3. Green Day - I agree with everything Tory said. I hated American Idiot, and their album before that was wretched.

4. Aerosmith - Am I the only person (I might actually be, I'm not sure) who hates the "Walk This Way" hip-hop crossover? I'd much rather hear just hip-hop, or a better rock band. Anyway, they're an all right band, I just think they're a good deal overhyped.

5. Kiss - Here's a band that is kind of all right (I guess) to begin with, but when you're fronted by Gene "I created Kiss and therefore am a musical god" Simmons, you make me want to hate you. Sorry Kiss. But thank you for bumping No Doubt from the list, as I knew at heart they violated Tory's rule of bands that are just plain bad.

Tim's Top 5:
I think Metallica has been given enough credit, as has Aerosmith, although "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" is really worthy of an entry all its own -- if you consider yourself a rock band, you don't play Diane Warren songs. PERIOD.

1) Dave Matthews Band - This is difficult for me, because I don't really know if anyone considers them good anymore, so they might just fall into the category of bands that are just awful...but every white college-aged male who enjoys recreational drug use (i.e. every white college-aged male who besides me, back in those days) thinks going to a Dave Matthews Band concert is their idea of frat boy paradise. No thanks. They haven't recorded anything but pablum since their first album, which is itself not good, so far as I can tell, but not the most contemptible thing of my lifetime. And everyone seems to at least sort of like them. Screw that. I hate Dave Matthews Band and all its works.

2) Radiohead - Radiohead inspires hatred in me unmatched by any other band. It's not because they're bad, but it's because they are so universally admired by critics for putting together tracks with incomprehensible lyrics and shit like "big fish eat the little ones". Thom Yorke has a great voice, their music was interesting on OK Computer, but the gooey mess on rock critics' face after Kid A and Amnesiac is inexcusable. Their willingness to be so utterly un-pop reminds me just why pop music has value...because at least it's honest.

3) The Doors - Again, like Radiohead, they're not a bad band. I own their greatest hits album, having bought it when I was 15. Other albums I bought when I was 15? Lord knows, but they have to be better than this. People who listened to FM radio in the 1980s and 1990s delightfully forgot that The Doors had songs with three minute keyboard solos for no apparent reason. Every once in a while I will voluntarily not skip by The Doors on the radio...but that's not to say they deserve the acclaim they've given themselves.

4) Led Zeppelin - I really just don't get it. And I will be honest, I don't get it so much that unlike Pink Floyd (who I could have put here, concededly), I've never tried to force myself to listen to Led Zeppelin. I'm not a heavy metal guy and I guess Led Zeppelin leaned in that direction, but I just don't find their music interesting. And people who listen to it I find even less interesting...because they're like self-parodies. Having watched half a season of Freaks and Geeks, it reminded me of why Led Zeppelin is still so revered -- because the people who really love Zeppelin are also the people that didn't ever get jobs, and therefore have more time to tell people about Plant & Page. I think the value of each individual in Led Zeppelin would add up to something around 500% of the value of Led Zeppelin to me. I like Fool in the Rain, but I think by liking Fool in the Rain, I really only underscore just how much I dislike Led Zeppelin. Whole Lotta Love, Stairway to Heaven...these are songs that I shan't miss.

5) ZZ Top - It's hard to not just list "The 1970s" in this list...Journey, Boston, Emerson Lake and Palmer, Yes, Rush...they could all go here. But in trying to distill a list of pure overrated via the Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame, I don't think it gets any more obvious to me than this one. ZZ Top is in the rock 'n' roll hall of fame. My only question is..."Lord almighty, how?" I know they've been around a long time, but this isn't the baseball hall of fame, I thought that you had to actually have more than two tracks people knew and at least one that people liked. They're not really trendsetters either, but here you have it. I'm not sure what world puts ZZ Top in the Rock 'n' Roll of Fame while excluding ... well, anyone.

Also of note: Rod Stewart warrants mention for having never done anything of significance by himself yet still attaining substantial fame/acclaim.