Dan's Top 5:
OK, this is admittedly a bit premature, but I really don't see any part of my list changing in the last two weeks of the year. I also realize that these albums were stumbled on by myself alone, so consider these my official recommendations for the year.
1. Ladyhawke - Ladyhawke - I got this album not even a month ago, and already Ladyhawke (alias of Pip Brown) has broken my top 5 on last.fm. This album summons ghosts of the 80's and never fails - it's like The Killers if they didn't go downhill after their first album. And if Brandon Flowers were even more of a woman than he already is. (Just kidding, Brandon.) There are no weak tracks at all, and it would be hard to even put together a top 5 list of tracks from this album. Look for that list in the future, because I'm all about trying to rank things that defy rankability. (Best song - "My Delirium")
2. Darker My Love - 2 - What I like about this album is that it has a wide range of influences. I can pick out a bit of early-era Black Sabbath, some U2, and even some earlier Snow Patrol. There's no single thing that makes this album particularly jump out at you, but it's solid, it sounds really good, and it has no weak tracks. If it got a bit more press, it would be one of those albums that will "save rock music." (Best song - "Pale Sun")
3. MGMT - Oracular Spectacular - This whole album is made of drugs. Then again, most of the classic albums throughout history are. But this is more like pure electro insanity. Overall, the sound is very original and fresh, and the first half of the album will just blow you away. The later tracks are a bit weak, though, which drives this album down the list. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some ecstasy to pop. (Best song - "Time to Pretend")
4. Gnarls Barkley - The Odd Couple - You know it's a good year in music when Gnarls Barkley winds up this far down my list. This is another sophomore release that initially failed to live up to the strength of the debut album, only to become far more listenable as time goes on. And my, how it has since rebounded in my playlist. It's good to know that these guys are not just a flash in the pan. (Best song - "Going On")
5. Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend - Yeah, they're cheesy and über-white, but damn it, the music is catchy nonetheless. Though I will never forgive them for the annoying single "A-Punk," the whole album is vaguely reminiscent of Paul Simon's Graceland, Peter Gabriel, or some other African-laced 80's album. Hey, apartheid was horrible and all, but at least there was some great music to come out of it, right? (Best song - "Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa")
Honorable Mention: Kanye West - 808s & Heartbreak, Sigur Rós - Með suð í eyrum við spilum endalaust, Muse - H.A.A.R.P. (Quite awesome, but easily bumped to make room for studio albums.)
Ryan's Top 5:
Once again I am reminded of how un-current my tastes are... even the new stuff I get into tends to be a year old (see M.I.A.). Anyway, here goes:
1. Ladyhawke - Ladyhawke - I really can't stress enough how much I like this album. If I were growing up in the 80's and Ladyhawke was around, I'd truly have been obsessed. As it stands I'm doing my best to get obsessed now, and so far it seems to be working. She might be my biggest musical crush since Muse? Favorites: Paris is Burning, From Dusk Till Dawn, Magic, Back of the Van, My Delirium, I mean, the whole damn album.
2. Gnarls Barkley - The Odd Couple - A great follow-up to their debut album, and somehow they still seem to be under the radar, so their semi-underground appeal is maintained and they aren't omnipresent. Favorites: Run, Going On, A Little Better.
3. Kanye West - 808s and Heartbreak - I love this album. I love this album a lot more than his last two albums. "Paranoid" might be my favorite song of the year, and it's certainly in my top 5 (list forthcoming, I'm sure, at some point).
4. Death Cab for Cutie - Narrow Stairs - Not nearly as good as previous albums, but whatever.
5. Flight of the Conchords - Flight of the Conchords - This album's placement at #5 is probably more a sign of how little new music I listen to than its overall greatness. Don't get me wrong, FOTC is one of the best things to happen this decade, but after the show/comedy acts this album was pretty underwhelming for me. There are numerous glaring omissions (I'm Not Crying, Sello Tape, If You're Into It, Bret You Got It Going On) and this album's version of "Robots" is maybe the worst there is (still good, but the eighteen youtube versions, and of course the show version, are better). Anyway, enough being an FOTC nerd, this album still kicked ass.
Showing posts with label 2008. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2008. Show all posts
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Top 5 Movies You Saw For the First Time This Year
Tim's Top 5:
I've not seen much in the way of movies this year in the theater (I think a total of six), but by my count I've seen 37 movies for the first time this year through finally watching DVDs I own, Netflix, or going to the theater.
1. Elevator to the Gallows - Louis Malle's debut film captures the inevitability and femme fatale aspects of film noir, but spins it in an unforeseen direction. The absurdism is certainly convenient and it requires suspension of disbelief, but the whole saga seems so plagued with fatalism that it feels real. The characters are a bit stock, but the scenario feels fresh 40 years later, and the Miles Davis score is unmatched. I'm embarrassed it took me this long to watch the movie, since I'd owned it since law school.
2. The Last Waltz - To make a concert film of The Band excellent was not something I anticipated would be all that easy, I was hardly a fan of their work. So after they'd played The Weight and Up on Cripple Creek, I really didn't think there'd be any reason to watch. Not so much. It's a fantastic concert from start to finish and the segments where Scorsese interviews The Band are pretty interesting as well.
3. United 93 - If 7 years of misguided responses to September 11 seem to have robbed you of how the day felt, this movie might just reopen those wounds. It brought a lot of gut responses back to me and put me right back in the place where I had been that morning. You know how the movie will end, but it's relentless and forces you to make a serious emotional investment in its outcome. It's a triumph of a film that feels heroic and disastrous all at once, but if nothing else, serves as a reminder of one of the most gut-wrenching days in American history.
4. Once - A nearly perfect film, even if it is functionally plotless. The charm of the two leads is immeasurable and their chemistry is flawless. Add Grafton Street and some other Dublin locales that made it feel relate-able, and you've got a can't-miss film. It doesn't, either, and refuses to take the most obvious path at any point.
5. The Dark Knight - I don't know if Heath Ledger deserves an Oscar, because I haven't seen much of any movies that came out this year, but it was a transformative performance. Though it reads as a political screed as much as a film, Batman's moral ambiguity and the willingness to destroy the sequel that was seemingly being set up pays off in spades. Like Casino Royale, it breathed new life into a film series that had a chance of going too far off the rails. The bad news is that the next film is almost certainly going to be worse (hence, the middling Quantum of Solace not appearing on this list).
Honorable mention: Pan's Labyrinth - I never would have thought it possible to like this movie based on what I'd read, but it's superbly-made and plays very straightforward for what is effectively a fairy tale; Standard Operating Procedure - one of Errol Morris' weaker films, but it personalizes the Abu Ghraib saga more than I'd have imagined possible; The Battle of Algiers - a surprisingly even-handed treatment of the Algerian conflict that relates a story others should have learned from in later conflicts like Vietnam; Iron Man - if anyone is ever cast as me in a movie, I'm hoping it will be Robert Downey Jr. He carries this movie single-handedly and brings a lot of humor to what could have been an overly fawning superhero film. Jon Favreau's direction recognized the humor available in the premise and maximizes it while making it modern.
Dan's Top 5:
As far as I can tell, I've watched 60 movies this year, so this is really hard.
1. Schindler's List - I thought that I wouldn't get this movie. It's about the Holocaust, after all, to which I feel no personal connection at all. But really, this is an excellent film showcasing the essentials of human decency amidst the most senseless of human ferocity. That Steven Spielberg made it is even more astounding, since he had mainly been a director for family-friendly blockbuster movies. At least he doesn't have to worry about which of his movies will be remembered as his best.
2. The Dark Knight - Very seldom is it that I go into a movie theater expecting to be blown away. (Even Best Picture contenders lately leave a lot to be desired.) Even more seldom is the case when the film in question surpasses that already high expectation. What likely seemed a strong movie on paper was taken to a completely different level by the performance of Heath Ledger, which turned the movie into a psychological - and at times philosophical - thriller reminiscent of Silence of the Lambs..
3. Wall-E - Every time Pixar releases a movie, I end up saying it's their best yet. I was fully convinced that Ratatouille was going to be the studio's peak and that the narrative quality would start to decline. The movie manages to accomplish so much with the bare minimum of dialogue, expressing character and emotion through imagery alone. It also accomplishes the remarkable feat of getting you to think about environmental concerns and consumerism without making it some forced political message in disguise. Oh, and if Peter Gabriel doesn't get an academy award for "Down To Earth," I will probably destroy something in my apartment.
4. Network - I didn't really know what to expect of this film going in, other than it was a classic. The level of farce in the story increases ever-so-gradually from completely believable to a level of absurdity matched only by the Bush administration. Personally, I think it would make for a good stage adaptation. It remains a powerful movie even now, when there are starting to emerge people, like me, who don't even watch television.
5. Dark Days - This is, to date, the best documentary film I've seen. It follows a series of homeless people who have taken refuge near abandoned Amtrak tracks near Penn Station. All the characters are engaging and often funny in the face of very hard circumstances. The film actually follows a natural plot rather than meandering from one didactic segment to another a la Bowling for Columbine (which I did like). Most importantly, it ends up being pretty uplifting and shows you what human potential really can be. Feel free to use this movie when battling conservatives.
Honorable Mention: Juno, There Will Be Blood, Do The Right Thing, The Third Man, Into The Wild
Ryan's Top 5:
Perhaps solely for this blog, and to feed my ever-growing OCD, I should start keeping track of movies I watch. (I don't.) So these are my top 5 as best as I can recollect.
1. There Will Be Blood - As much as I disdain anything that's not a comedy, this movie was truly brilliant and veritably flawless. You don't see many true modern tragedies, but this surely was one, and a stellar one.
2. Forgetting Sarah Marshall - This movie was A) hilarious, B) heartwarming, C) well-acted with funny actors, and D) funnier than 40-Year-Old Virgin and Knocked Up (comparative as all are Apatow movies). Jason Segel and Russell Brand are particularly great. It also boasts a Dracula musical with puppets from Jim Henson's Creature Shop.
3. Wall-E - Differs slightly in tone from my choice for #1. I can't say that I circle calendar dates in anticipation of PIXAR movies, but they really deserve praise for their writing. Animation aside, they rarely make bad movies; some are better than others, sure, but have they ever made anything completely bad? I don't think so, and there have been plenty of shit-tastic 3D animation movies (that shark piece of trash that I actually saw in a theater comes to mind). Anyway, Wall-E may be their best effort to date. I don't have kids, but if I did, this seemingly would be the perfect movie to take them to.
4. The Dark Knight - I think Tim and Dan said it better than I could. I will say that when movies are talked up so much it almost always affects my reaction to the film adversely. This was not the case here, though, as The Dark Knight delivered. And for days after the film I was wiki'ing Batman and hypothesizing who would be the villain in the sequel.
5. Be Kind Rewind - Did critics dislike this movie? I guess it wasn't as funny as you'd hope a Jack Black/Mos Def movie would be, but... on second thought, wasn't it? I dunno, I loved it. Michel Gondry does not disappoint.
Honorables: Run, Fatboy, Run (probably a dumb movie, but I laughed a lot); No Country for Old Men (saw it on DVD in March or so); Dewey Cox (honorable in that I really thought it would suck and it was actually worth RedBoxing, pretty funny); W. (either I'm not smart enough or not politically-inclined enough to expound on the film's realism/lack thereof, but I enjoyed it...the press conference scenes, taken from Real Actual Life, are pretty damn painful); Iron Man (Robert Downey, Jr., is one of my favorite actors, and Tim's right, this film minus him is forgettable).
Dishonorables: Semi-Pro (do not watch this film--repeat, do NOT watch this film); Strange Wilderness (I wasted money on renting this, blagghgh); 21 (classic case of I-read-the-book-first-and-therefore-this-movie-sucks, but come on, they distort reality so much it hurts); Leatherheads (should have been better/funnier than it was); Harold and Kumar Escape... (not a good movie, at all, in any sense, and I liked the first one); Made of Honor (N.B. I did not actually see this movie but I conjecture it is the worst Pile of Suck ever created, look at the fucking title and forget about it, Jesus, do not see this movie); Indiana Jones (we waited 20 goddamn years for THIS?!?!); An American Carol (see my critique of Made of Honor).
I've not seen much in the way of movies this year in the theater (I think a total of six), but by my count I've seen 37 movies for the first time this year through finally watching DVDs I own, Netflix, or going to the theater.
1. Elevator to the Gallows - Louis Malle's debut film captures the inevitability and femme fatale aspects of film noir, but spins it in an unforeseen direction. The absurdism is certainly convenient and it requires suspension of disbelief, but the whole saga seems so plagued with fatalism that it feels real. The characters are a bit stock, but the scenario feels fresh 40 years later, and the Miles Davis score is unmatched. I'm embarrassed it took me this long to watch the movie, since I'd owned it since law school.
2. The Last Waltz - To make a concert film of The Band excellent was not something I anticipated would be all that easy, I was hardly a fan of their work. So after they'd played The Weight and Up on Cripple Creek, I really didn't think there'd be any reason to watch. Not so much. It's a fantastic concert from start to finish and the segments where Scorsese interviews The Band are pretty interesting as well.
3. United 93 - If 7 years of misguided responses to September 11 seem to have robbed you of how the day felt, this movie might just reopen those wounds. It brought a lot of gut responses back to me and put me right back in the place where I had been that morning. You know how the movie will end, but it's relentless and forces you to make a serious emotional investment in its outcome. It's a triumph of a film that feels heroic and disastrous all at once, but if nothing else, serves as a reminder of one of the most gut-wrenching days in American history.
4. Once - A nearly perfect film, even if it is functionally plotless. The charm of the two leads is immeasurable and their chemistry is flawless. Add Grafton Street and some other Dublin locales that made it feel relate-able, and you've got a can't-miss film. It doesn't, either, and refuses to take the most obvious path at any point.
5. The Dark Knight - I don't know if Heath Ledger deserves an Oscar, because I haven't seen much of any movies that came out this year, but it was a transformative performance. Though it reads as a political screed as much as a film, Batman's moral ambiguity and the willingness to destroy the sequel that was seemingly being set up pays off in spades. Like Casino Royale, it breathed new life into a film series that had a chance of going too far off the rails. The bad news is that the next film is almost certainly going to be worse (hence, the middling Quantum of Solace not appearing on this list).
Honorable mention: Pan's Labyrinth - I never would have thought it possible to like this movie based on what I'd read, but it's superbly-made and plays very straightforward for what is effectively a fairy tale; Standard Operating Procedure - one of Errol Morris' weaker films, but it personalizes the Abu Ghraib saga more than I'd have imagined possible; The Battle of Algiers - a surprisingly even-handed treatment of the Algerian conflict that relates a story others should have learned from in later conflicts like Vietnam; Iron Man - if anyone is ever cast as me in a movie, I'm hoping it will be Robert Downey Jr. He carries this movie single-handedly and brings a lot of humor to what could have been an overly fawning superhero film. Jon Favreau's direction recognized the humor available in the premise and maximizes it while making it modern.
Dan's Top 5:
As far as I can tell, I've watched 60 movies this year, so this is really hard.
1. Schindler's List - I thought that I wouldn't get this movie. It's about the Holocaust, after all, to which I feel no personal connection at all. But really, this is an excellent film showcasing the essentials of human decency amidst the most senseless of human ferocity. That Steven Spielberg made it is even more astounding, since he had mainly been a director for family-friendly blockbuster movies. At least he doesn't have to worry about which of his movies will be remembered as his best.
2. The Dark Knight - Very seldom is it that I go into a movie theater expecting to be blown away. (Even Best Picture contenders lately leave a lot to be desired.) Even more seldom is the case when the film in question surpasses that already high expectation. What likely seemed a strong movie on paper was taken to a completely different level by the performance of Heath Ledger, which turned the movie into a psychological - and at times philosophical - thriller reminiscent of Silence of the Lambs..
3. Wall-E - Every time Pixar releases a movie, I end up saying it's their best yet. I was fully convinced that Ratatouille was going to be the studio's peak and that the narrative quality would start to decline. The movie manages to accomplish so much with the bare minimum of dialogue, expressing character and emotion through imagery alone. It also accomplishes the remarkable feat of getting you to think about environmental concerns and consumerism without making it some forced political message in disguise. Oh, and if Peter Gabriel doesn't get an academy award for "Down To Earth," I will probably destroy something in my apartment.
4. Network - I didn't really know what to expect of this film going in, other than it was a classic. The level of farce in the story increases ever-so-gradually from completely believable to a level of absurdity matched only by the Bush administration. Personally, I think it would make for a good stage adaptation. It remains a powerful movie even now, when there are starting to emerge people, like me, who don't even watch television.
5. Dark Days - This is, to date, the best documentary film I've seen. It follows a series of homeless people who have taken refuge near abandoned Amtrak tracks near Penn Station. All the characters are engaging and often funny in the face of very hard circumstances. The film actually follows a natural plot rather than meandering from one didactic segment to another a la Bowling for Columbine (which I did like). Most importantly, it ends up being pretty uplifting and shows you what human potential really can be. Feel free to use this movie when battling conservatives.
Honorable Mention: Juno, There Will Be Blood, Do The Right Thing, The Third Man, Into The Wild
Ryan's Top 5:
Perhaps solely for this blog, and to feed my ever-growing OCD, I should start keeping track of movies I watch. (I don't.) So these are my top 5 as best as I can recollect.
1. There Will Be Blood - As much as I disdain anything that's not a comedy, this movie was truly brilliant and veritably flawless. You don't see many true modern tragedies, but this surely was one, and a stellar one.
2. Forgetting Sarah Marshall - This movie was A) hilarious, B) heartwarming, C) well-acted with funny actors, and D) funnier than 40-Year-Old Virgin and Knocked Up (comparative as all are Apatow movies). Jason Segel and Russell Brand are particularly great. It also boasts a Dracula musical with puppets from Jim Henson's Creature Shop.
3. Wall-E - Differs slightly in tone from my choice for #1. I can't say that I circle calendar dates in anticipation of PIXAR movies, but they really deserve praise for their writing. Animation aside, they rarely make bad movies; some are better than others, sure, but have they ever made anything completely bad? I don't think so, and there have been plenty of shit-tastic 3D animation movies (that shark piece of trash that I actually saw in a theater comes to mind). Anyway, Wall-E may be their best effort to date. I don't have kids, but if I did, this seemingly would be the perfect movie to take them to.
4. The Dark Knight - I think Tim and Dan said it better than I could. I will say that when movies are talked up so much it almost always affects my reaction to the film adversely. This was not the case here, though, as The Dark Knight delivered. And for days after the film I was wiki'ing Batman and hypothesizing who would be the villain in the sequel.
5. Be Kind Rewind - Did critics dislike this movie? I guess it wasn't as funny as you'd hope a Jack Black/Mos Def movie would be, but... on second thought, wasn't it? I dunno, I loved it. Michel Gondry does not disappoint.
Honorables: Run, Fatboy, Run (probably a dumb movie, but I laughed a lot); No Country for Old Men (saw it on DVD in March or so); Dewey Cox (honorable in that I really thought it would suck and it was actually worth RedBoxing, pretty funny); W. (either I'm not smart enough or not politically-inclined enough to expound on the film's realism/lack thereof, but I enjoyed it...the press conference scenes, taken from Real Actual Life, are pretty damn painful); Iron Man (Robert Downey, Jr., is one of my favorite actors, and Tim's right, this film minus him is forgettable).
Dishonorables: Semi-Pro (do not watch this film--repeat, do NOT watch this film); Strange Wilderness (I wasted money on renting this, blagghgh); 21 (classic case of I-read-the-book-first-and-therefore-this-movie-sucks, but come on, they distort reality so much it hurts); Leatherheads (should have been better/funnier than it was); Harold and Kumar Escape... (not a good movie, at all, in any sense, and I liked the first one); Made of Honor (N.B. I did not actually see this movie but I conjecture it is the worst Pile of Suck ever created, look at the fucking title and forget about it, Jesus, do not see this movie); Indiana Jones (we waited 20 goddamn years for THIS?!?!); An American Carol (see my critique of Made of Honor).
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Top 5 Travesties in the 2008 All-Star Game
Tim's Top 5:
In case you hadn't noticed, and unless you were me, you hadn't...today is The Top 5's first birthday. Instead of something truly special to commemorate its first birthday...I'm going to complain about how much baseball fans are truly ignorant and how much worse baseball players and managers apparently are. That's right, I need two blogs to do this now.
I can be silent no longer! (note: in fact, I've already created a facebook group called "Jason Varitek is not an all-star", so it's hard to claim I've been silent thus far). This year's All-Star rosters have several travesties, which are hard to even reduce to such a brief list. So this list commemorates the awful inclusions, exclusions, and other potentially abhorrent aspects of the 2008 All-Star Game.
1. Jason Varitek is named to the AL All-Star Team - This one's on the players. Jason Varitek's offensive numbers just barely beat out my own. He's batting a whopping .217 with seven home runs, 27 RBIs, and slugged .360 in 242 at bats, when he's batting around guys like Kevin Youkilis, Dustin Pedroia, Mike Lowell, Manny Ramirez, and David Ortiz. In contrast, Kelly Shoppach, who has filled in as part of baseball's least potent lineup while Victor Martinez has been on the DL, has hit .270 with seven home runs and 20 RBIs while slugging .493! in 148 at bats. I don't hesitate to say that I would take every single American League starting catcher over Varitek and I know that every one of them could be defensible on a purely statistical basis.
2. Ichiro Suzuki -- again -- This one's on the fans. Yeah, here we go again. Japanese people should not be permitted to vote for the All-Star Game, because they really make a mockery of the All-Star game, electing both Ichiro Suzuki and Kosuke Fukudome as starters (thank god for Chase Utley, otherwise Kaz Matsui was almost assured a spot of his own). Kosuke is certainly unworthy, but not nearly unworthy on the level of Ichiro. Ichiro has warranted being in the All-Star game in years past, but this is not one of them. He's .304/.362/.376 for a whopping OPS of .738, an OPS matched only by 22 other outfielders in the American League, out of 32 who are eligible. Yes, Ichiro steals bases, and yes, that brings some value, but even if we added those thirty three steals to his slugging percentage (turn 33 singles into doubles), which is an utterly preposterous exaggeration of their value, since doubles are hits that lead to other batters scoring more frequently, whereas steals only help if people after Ichiro get hits...Ichiro has an OPS of .920, which would be good for the second best in the American League...except that if we did that for everyone else, he'd still barely be clinging to the top 10. He has the 13th best OBP among qualifying AL outfielders, he's not a good defensive player in centerfield (.879 zone rating, roughly equivalent to Josh Hamilton (.874), way behind Sizemore .922 and Granderson .909), and his inclusion leads to Brandon Morrow missing an all-star game even though he has an ERA of 0.65! and has become an effective closer (7 saves in 7 opportunities) after dominating in a setup role.
3. Joe Crede? Seriously? - Joe Crede is having a perfectly adequate season for the surprising White Sox. Except whoops...Evan Longoria and Mike Lowell are the only people who have a claim to this spot, given that Guillen is a lock because of his lousy teammates. You can't even blame this one on old-school people who are enamored with batting average to the exclusion of OBP and OPS, because Crede is worse than Lowell and Longoria in substantially worse than both Lowell and Longoria in average, OBP, and OPS.
4. Derek Jeter - This is on the fans, but would have been on the players, who would have chosen him anyway. This guy is a really shitty baseball player, and I am so tired of seeing him get sucked off by baseball as a whole. He's not even the second best shortstop in the American League (see my analysis on hunglikeajury.blogspot.com, which has only been skewed more in Peralta's favor since I wrote it), but he gets voted in without even a thought as to whether another person is more worthy. In fact, no shortstops are particularly worthy, Pedroia should just be forced to play shortstop in the all-star game to make room for adequate infielders, but Jeter is definitely not worth starting.
5. It "counts" - This one's on the commissioner. The home field advantage for the World Series is stupid and reeks of Bud Selig trying to make things "relevant".
Honorable mentions: the fact that someone other than Cliff Lee will inevitably start the All-Star game, Miguel Tejada, Brian Wilson, Pat Burrell being left behind despite leading NL outfielders in OPS, Miguel Tejada, the fact that I have to admit Jason Giambi's steroided ass is worthy of playing in the All-Star game, Xavier Nady being left off.
Dan's Top 5:
Now, I haven't been paying that much attention to baseball this year, but I have been paying attention enough to realize that the Cubs are one of the best teams in the majors, at least in terms of winning percentage. Being the superstitious fan I am, I refuse to pay further attention to the game until I am sure that they have secured a playoff spot and cannot possibly collapse. So that's my disclaimer - I haven't been paying attention this season. And I'm too lazy to look up any more than the most basic of stats.
1. The Boston Red Sox - Wow, Boston be representin' with seven players. They must be lighting up the standings. Wait, what's that? They're not even winning their division? Where the hell are the Rays? Don't tell me that the reason that Tampa Bay is 4.5 games ahead of the Red Sox is because of Navarro and Kazmir alone. Now, to be fair, I'll give you #2...
2. Seven versus Seven - Both Boston and the Chicago Cubs have seven players elected to the All-Star Game. Even as a fan of the Cubs, I think this is a bit much. Let the World Series come at the end of the season, no matter how badly you wanted to see both teams make it in 2003. Wait, my whole argument assumes that there are other players in the NL that are suitable for the All Star roster... How about Xavier Nady or something? He's batting fucking .321. (I actually hadn't even looked at Tim's list for this idea before I wrote this one.)
3. Derek Jeter - I see that he's already made Tim's list, and after reading his capsule review, I wholeheartedly agree and have nothing of value to add. Why the hell do the people of New York like this asshat more than Alex Rodriguez anyway?
4. Yankee Stadium - This is the stadium's last year, right? OK, so there's a hint of wistful nostalgia here. But remember that this will essentially be the Cubs versus the Red Sox. Let's pray that it doesn't turn into the Cubs versus the Red Sox versus the drunk, pissed off New Yorkers. Then again, that would make for a hell of a Youtube video highlight.
5. Jason Varitek - Ok, after doing a bare minimum of research, I can see how this was Tim's #1. I think I'd rather have Kelly Shoppach on the All Star team than Varitek. Apart from the funny name, that's not even a joke. (Again, thought of this before I read Tim's response.)
Honorable Mention: Only Two Rays? - This was covered in #1 already, but seriously, it deserves one more mention.
Ryan's Top 5:
1. Joe Buck and Tim McCarver - I realize that by now we should be resigned to the fact that Fox owns the All-Star game. But I'm sorry, watching any sports on Fox makes me sad. Joe Buck's voice makes my skin crawl. (This and this pretty much sum it up for Buck.) As for Tim McCarver... well, I have a natural hatred for anyone associated with St. Louis (see Buck). And Fox is hiding the Family Guy clip I want to link to, so here's the dialog:
2. Jason Varitek - I agree with what Tim and Dan said. This really is the biggest All-Star mistake, I think everyone should agree with that.
3. 2/3 of the Cubs Outfield Starting - Anyone whose stats compare favorably with Alex Gordon this year shouldn't be starting in an all-star game. Also, if these two get in, shouldn't David DeJesus, who's arguably having a better year than both? The answer is no. None of them should.
4. Brian Wilson - This was the first name that jumped out at me (after, obviously Varitek, Soriano, Kosuke, Ichiro). Do we need two Giants in this game? Is the National League that bad? The Royals are a better team than the Giants, but we only get our best player in the game. Look, give this spot to Cole Hamels, please. Or another reliever--Jon Rauch? (The Nationals aren't that far off... though Cristian Guzman really shouldn't be in this game, I am not going to look at his stats, it's common sense, it's like you telling me the Chiefs would be in the Super Bowl next year.); Takashi Saito, Hong-Chih Kuo, Francisco Cordero, etc.?
5. Evan Longoria - First he gets left off the opening day roster, now the all-star roster. Come on, folks. Give the rookie his due. I'd much rather watch an up-and-coming superstar than Joe Crede (see Tim's list) or Mike freaking Lowell.
Dishonorable Mention: I hate the Home Run Derby, but I will watch it, and thus I will have to listen to Chris Berman for the first time since football season.
In case you hadn't noticed, and unless you were me, you hadn't...today is The Top 5's first birthday. Instead of something truly special to commemorate its first birthday...I'm going to complain about how much baseball fans are truly ignorant and how much worse baseball players and managers apparently are. That's right, I need two blogs to do this now.
I can be silent no longer! (note: in fact, I've already created a facebook group called "Jason Varitek is not an all-star", so it's hard to claim I've been silent thus far). This year's All-Star rosters have several travesties, which are hard to even reduce to such a brief list. So this list commemorates the awful inclusions, exclusions, and other potentially abhorrent aspects of the 2008 All-Star Game.
1. Jason Varitek is named to the AL All-Star Team - This one's on the players. Jason Varitek's offensive numbers just barely beat out my own. He's batting a whopping .217 with seven home runs, 27 RBIs, and slugged .360 in 242 at bats, when he's batting around guys like Kevin Youkilis, Dustin Pedroia, Mike Lowell, Manny Ramirez, and David Ortiz. In contrast, Kelly Shoppach, who has filled in as part of baseball's least potent lineup while Victor Martinez has been on the DL, has hit .270 with seven home runs and 20 RBIs while slugging .493! in 148 at bats. I don't hesitate to say that I would take every single American League starting catcher over Varitek and I know that every one of them could be defensible on a purely statistical basis.
2. Ichiro Suzuki -- again -- This one's on the fans. Yeah, here we go again. Japanese people should not be permitted to vote for the All-Star Game, because they really make a mockery of the All-Star game, electing both Ichiro Suzuki and Kosuke Fukudome as starters (thank god for Chase Utley, otherwise Kaz Matsui was almost assured a spot of his own). Kosuke is certainly unworthy, but not nearly unworthy on the level of Ichiro. Ichiro has warranted being in the All-Star game in years past, but this is not one of them. He's .304/.362/.376 for a whopping OPS of .738, an OPS matched only by 22 other outfielders in the American League, out of 32 who are eligible. Yes, Ichiro steals bases, and yes, that brings some value, but even if we added those thirty three steals to his slugging percentage (turn 33 singles into doubles), which is an utterly preposterous exaggeration of their value, since doubles are hits that lead to other batters scoring more frequently, whereas steals only help if people after Ichiro get hits...Ichiro has an OPS of .920, which would be good for the second best in the American League...except that if we did that for everyone else, he'd still barely be clinging to the top 10. He has the 13th best OBP among qualifying AL outfielders, he's not a good defensive player in centerfield (.879 zone rating, roughly equivalent to Josh Hamilton (.874), way behind Sizemore .922 and Granderson .909), and his inclusion leads to Brandon Morrow missing an all-star game even though he has an ERA of 0.65! and has become an effective closer (7 saves in 7 opportunities) after dominating in a setup role.
3. Joe Crede? Seriously? - Joe Crede is having a perfectly adequate season for the surprising White Sox. Except whoops...Evan Longoria and Mike Lowell are the only people who have a claim to this spot, given that Guillen is a lock because of his lousy teammates. You can't even blame this one on old-school people who are enamored with batting average to the exclusion of OBP and OPS, because Crede is worse than Lowell and Longoria in substantially worse than both Lowell and Longoria in average, OBP, and OPS.
4. Derek Jeter - This is on the fans, but would have been on the players, who would have chosen him anyway. This guy is a really shitty baseball player, and I am so tired of seeing him get sucked off by baseball as a whole. He's not even the second best shortstop in the American League (see my analysis on hunglikeajury.blogspot.com, which has only been skewed more in Peralta's favor since I wrote it), but he gets voted in without even a thought as to whether another person is more worthy. In fact, no shortstops are particularly worthy, Pedroia should just be forced to play shortstop in the all-star game to make room for adequate infielders, but Jeter is definitely not worth starting.
5. It "counts" - This one's on the commissioner. The home field advantage for the World Series is stupid and reeks of Bud Selig trying to make things "relevant".
Honorable mentions: the fact that someone other than Cliff Lee will inevitably start the All-Star game, Miguel Tejada, Brian Wilson, Pat Burrell being left behind despite leading NL outfielders in OPS, Miguel Tejada, the fact that I have to admit Jason Giambi's steroided ass is worthy of playing in the All-Star game, Xavier Nady being left off.
Dan's Top 5:
Now, I haven't been paying that much attention to baseball this year, but I have been paying attention enough to realize that the Cubs are one of the best teams in the majors, at least in terms of winning percentage. Being the superstitious fan I am, I refuse to pay further attention to the game until I am sure that they have secured a playoff spot and cannot possibly collapse. So that's my disclaimer - I haven't been paying attention this season. And I'm too lazy to look up any more than the most basic of stats.
1. The Boston Red Sox - Wow, Boston be representin' with seven players. They must be lighting up the standings. Wait, what's that? They're not even winning their division? Where the hell are the Rays? Don't tell me that the reason that Tampa Bay is 4.5 games ahead of the Red Sox is because of Navarro and Kazmir alone. Now, to be fair, I'll give you #2...
2. Seven versus Seven - Both Boston and the Chicago Cubs have seven players elected to the All-Star Game. Even as a fan of the Cubs, I think this is a bit much. Let the World Series come at the end of the season, no matter how badly you wanted to see both teams make it in 2003. Wait, my whole argument assumes that there are other players in the NL that are suitable for the All Star roster... How about Xavier Nady or something? He's batting fucking .321. (I actually hadn't even looked at Tim's list for this idea before I wrote this one.)
3. Derek Jeter - I see that he's already made Tim's list, and after reading his capsule review, I wholeheartedly agree and have nothing of value to add. Why the hell do the people of New York like this asshat more than Alex Rodriguez anyway?
4. Yankee Stadium - This is the stadium's last year, right? OK, so there's a hint of wistful nostalgia here. But remember that this will essentially be the Cubs versus the Red Sox. Let's pray that it doesn't turn into the Cubs versus the Red Sox versus the drunk, pissed off New Yorkers. Then again, that would make for a hell of a Youtube video highlight.
5. Jason Varitek - Ok, after doing a bare minimum of research, I can see how this was Tim's #1. I think I'd rather have Kelly Shoppach on the All Star team than Varitek. Apart from the funny name, that's not even a joke. (Again, thought of this before I read Tim's response.)
Honorable Mention: Only Two Rays? - This was covered in #1 already, but seriously, it deserves one more mention.
Ryan's Top 5:
1. Joe Buck and Tim McCarver - I realize that by now we should be resigned to the fact that Fox owns the All-Star game. But I'm sorry, watching any sports on Fox makes me sad. Joe Buck's voice makes my skin crawl. (This and this pretty much sum it up for Buck.) As for Tim McCarver... well, I have a natural hatred for anyone associated with St. Louis (see Buck). And Fox is hiding the Family Guy clip I want to link to, so here's the dialog:
Brian Griffin: Well, I guess Stewie couldn't be any worse than Tim McCarver is at sportscasting.
[cut to Tim McCarver sportscasting]
Tim McCarver: In my view, as good as the Yankees were in the first half of this game, that's how as bad they've been now.
2. Jason Varitek - I agree with what Tim and Dan said. This really is the biggest All-Star mistake, I think everyone should agree with that.
3. 2/3 of the Cubs Outfield Starting - Anyone whose stats compare favorably with Alex Gordon this year shouldn't be starting in an all-star game. Also, if these two get in, shouldn't David DeJesus, who's arguably having a better year than both? The answer is no. None of them should.
4. Brian Wilson - This was the first name that jumped out at me (after, obviously Varitek, Soriano, Kosuke, Ichiro). Do we need two Giants in this game? Is the National League that bad? The Royals are a better team than the Giants, but we only get our best player in the game. Look, give this spot to Cole Hamels, please. Or another reliever--Jon Rauch? (The Nationals aren't that far off... though Cristian Guzman really shouldn't be in this game, I am not going to look at his stats, it's common sense, it's like you telling me the Chiefs would be in the Super Bowl next year.); Takashi Saito, Hong-Chih Kuo, Francisco Cordero, etc.?
5. Evan Longoria - First he gets left off the opening day roster, now the all-star roster. Come on, folks. Give the rookie his due. I'd much rather watch an up-and-coming superstar than Joe Crede (see Tim's list) or Mike freaking Lowell.
Dishonorable Mention: I hate the Home Run Derby, but I will watch it, and thus I will have to listen to Chris Berman for the first time since football season.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Top 5 Worst Best Picture Nominees 2000-present
Tim's Top 5:
I was going to say films to win best picture, but since I'm quite certain I'm the only person on here who can tell you definitively how much worse The English Patient was than Cimarron...I figured I'd keep it current.
(For convenience sake, at the end, I've included all the films that fall into the category. For the record, I've not seen Babel nor Atonement. This completes the list of movies I haven't seen on said list. I suspect both might crack my top 5 list)
1) The Hours - This movie reads like a lifetime original motion picture. Nicole Kidman got an Oscar for being ugly in the same way Bill Murray almost came away with an Oscar for not being funny (see #2), and a movie that's supposed to be about women comes off as being one of the most chauvinistic films in decades. Women get by because of their gay friends with AIDS (Ed Harris in a truly punishing performance), or they don't get by at all. Meryl Streep comes off as an awful stereotype of the independent woman who is, as I wrote in my initial review "perpetually smug"...aw, hell, I have to quote me here "[Streep] occupies the screen like she's paying rent there, and emotes her way through an agonizing, yet critically-acclaimed performance." But since Streep is the focal point of the movie, there's little else to say. It's a dreadful assemblage of thin characters and obvious motifs.
2) Lost In Translation - Sofia Coppola has made three films, two of which I've had the misfortune of seeing. But while The Virgin Suicides suffered from a creepy narrator and not much of a story, Lost In Translation suffers from the fact that no one bothered to check whether the movie was finished before releasing it. You watch Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray, they do things, they develop a bit of a relationship, and then the oh so touching ending THAT NO ONE WROTE. If you invite me to pay $10 for a movie, the least you can do is actually have a beginning, a middle, and an end -- not just make the entire movie hinge on words that no one hears. I love this -- someone trying to defend the movie on the IMDb said "pointless, plotless, and boring?" to try and defeat a straw man. But actually, they summarized it pretty beautifully -- I'll strike the question mark and this movie finally has an ending.
3) The Green Mile - Few movies have the gall to be so openly manipulative as The Green Mile, which is a woeful failure in all the ways The Shawshank Redemption was successful. Tom Hanks tries to play a bladder infection for laughs and fails, the Christian allegory is horrifically transparent, the movie is three hours long, and it manages to make every character unlikeable. Then throw in some heavy-handed Hollywood nostalgia. Also, if possible, try to make the movie completely anachronistic in geography and time period. Hey, you did it. Thanks.
4) No Country For Old Men - Few movies have left me feeling so angry. I walked out of there pretty much holding my head with anguish at what had just been declared a massively successful film achievement. While The Departed was a profound disappointment that amounted to little more than a bloodbath, there was a point...sort of. Nearly everyone's dead, you get to watch a lot of gruesome deaths, the sound is horrifying (I'll give them props, they were robbed at the Oscars, listening to this movie made me ill), and Bardem is pretty good at playing the remorseless psychotic with no purpose in killing, but it still adds up to a movie that leaves you pretty much where you started or worse. Fatalism and nihilism doesn't make for good filmmaking unless there's some sort of devolution throughout the film.
5) A Beautiful Mind - So how do you make a terrible biopic? Well, cast someone really unsuitable for a role -- wiry mathematician...enter Russell Crowe. Wipe their life story of anything the least bit controversial -- take that communist tendencies and homosexuality. Throw in a love interest that's not believable -- Jennifer Connelly with mathematician...check. Now add things that are utterly preposterous (like a mythical roommate) and change everything about the story to make it more Hollywood. Shudder. This is fish-in-a-barrel drama, but it's still executed as badly as Michael Clarke Duncan in The Green Mile.
Honorable mention: Finding Neverland - Enough with the Johnny Depp blowing, film critics, it's been a while since he's made a good movie; The Sixth Sense - when you've got a one-bit premise, try not to make it totally obvious. Unbreakable was infinitely better; Chocolat - a film that was so painfully American in attempting to be French or Italian. Harvey Weinstein definitely engaged in sexual favors for it to be nominated; Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring - what happens, exactly? I'm not a fan of LotR, so I could go on, but all others like opaque cinema where you can actually see Peter Jackson making decisions with extreme close-ups, slow motion, soft focus, and everything but a constant barrage of center wipes; The Departed - it sucked. Scorsese needs to stay out of Boston.
Best Picture Nominees:
2000-2008
American Beauty
Atonement
The Aviator
Babel
A Beautiful Mind
Brokeback Mountain
Capote
Chicago
Chocolat
The Cider House Rules
Crash
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
The Departed
Erin Brockovich
Finding Neverland
Gangs of New York
Gladiator
Good Night, and Good Luck
Gosford Park
The Green Mile
The Hours
The Insider
In the Bedroom
Juno
Letters From Iwo Jima
Little Miss Sunshine
Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring
Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Master and Commander: the Far Side of the World
Michael Clayton
Million Dollar Baby
Moulin Rouge!
Munich
Mystic River
No Country For Old Men
The Pianist
The Queen
Ray
Seabiscuit
Sideways
The Sixth Sense
There Will Be Blood
Traffic
Ryan's Top Five
I have not seen but 30-40% of this list. I shall persevere.
1. "The Sixth Sense" - Tim's right--"Unbreakable" was a lot better (read: good, not bad).
2. "Lost in Translation" - I only saw this once, but damn, this movie was boring. I have to like characters to get involved, and I didn't like any of these people.
3. "Ray" - Jamie Foxx deserved to win best actor. That said, biopics BORE THE BEJESUS out of me.
4. "The Fellowship of the Ring" - I really liked "The Two Towers," this one as boring as sin. Seriously.
5. "Little Miss Sunshine" - I do really like this movie and Steve Carell was great, but the ending was a bit too off for it to be a "best movie." (Keep in mind there are probably many movies I could see that would knock this one off the list.)
Dan's Top 5:
I actually like all the films in the list that I saw in the aforementioned list, with exception of what is noted below.
1. Mystic River - I just flat out didn't like it.
2. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon - All I remember was seeing a bunch of flying around on wires. I didn't get to see the full movie, but I doubt I would have liked it.
3. Erin Brockovich - I like this movie, actually. But I get it already - the main character is a woman.
4. Little Miss Sunshine - Probably one of the worst endings ever, especially for india cinema.
5. Master and Commander: the Far Side of the World - I can't remember the main conflict of this movie. I've seen it, but nothing stuck. I was really expecting more out of this movie.
Honorable mention: Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
I was going to say films to win best picture, but since I'm quite certain I'm the only person on here who can tell you definitively how much worse The English Patient was than Cimarron...I figured I'd keep it current.
(For convenience sake, at the end, I've included all the films that fall into the category. For the record, I've not seen Babel nor Atonement. This completes the list of movies I haven't seen on said list. I suspect both might crack my top 5 list)
1) The Hours - This movie reads like a lifetime original motion picture. Nicole Kidman got an Oscar for being ugly in the same way Bill Murray almost came away with an Oscar for not being funny (see #2), and a movie that's supposed to be about women comes off as being one of the most chauvinistic films in decades. Women get by because of their gay friends with AIDS (Ed Harris in a truly punishing performance), or they don't get by at all. Meryl Streep comes off as an awful stereotype of the independent woman who is, as I wrote in my initial review "perpetually smug"...aw, hell, I have to quote me here "[Streep] occupies the screen like she's paying rent there, and emotes her way through an agonizing, yet critically-acclaimed performance." But since Streep is the focal point of the movie, there's little else to say. It's a dreadful assemblage of thin characters and obvious motifs.
2) Lost In Translation - Sofia Coppola has made three films, two of which I've had the misfortune of seeing. But while The Virgin Suicides suffered from a creepy narrator and not much of a story, Lost In Translation suffers from the fact that no one bothered to check whether the movie was finished before releasing it. You watch Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray, they do things, they develop a bit of a relationship, and then the oh so touching ending THAT NO ONE WROTE. If you invite me to pay $10 for a movie, the least you can do is actually have a beginning, a middle, and an end -- not just make the entire movie hinge on words that no one hears. I love this -- someone trying to defend the movie on the IMDb said "pointless, plotless, and boring?" to try and defeat a straw man. But actually, they summarized it pretty beautifully -- I'll strike the question mark and this movie finally has an ending.
3) The Green Mile - Few movies have the gall to be so openly manipulative as The Green Mile, which is a woeful failure in all the ways The Shawshank Redemption was successful. Tom Hanks tries to play a bladder infection for laughs and fails, the Christian allegory is horrifically transparent, the movie is three hours long, and it manages to make every character unlikeable. Then throw in some heavy-handed Hollywood nostalgia. Also, if possible, try to make the movie completely anachronistic in geography and time period. Hey, you did it. Thanks.
4) No Country For Old Men - Few movies have left me feeling so angry. I walked out of there pretty much holding my head with anguish at what had just been declared a massively successful film achievement. While The Departed was a profound disappointment that amounted to little more than a bloodbath, there was a point...sort of. Nearly everyone's dead, you get to watch a lot of gruesome deaths, the sound is horrifying (I'll give them props, they were robbed at the Oscars, listening to this movie made me ill), and Bardem is pretty good at playing the remorseless psychotic with no purpose in killing, but it still adds up to a movie that leaves you pretty much where you started or worse. Fatalism and nihilism doesn't make for good filmmaking unless there's some sort of devolution throughout the film.
5) A Beautiful Mind - So how do you make a terrible biopic? Well, cast someone really unsuitable for a role -- wiry mathematician...enter Russell Crowe. Wipe their life story of anything the least bit controversial -- take that communist tendencies and homosexuality. Throw in a love interest that's not believable -- Jennifer Connelly with mathematician...check. Now add things that are utterly preposterous (like a mythical roommate) and change everything about the story to make it more Hollywood. Shudder. This is fish-in-a-barrel drama, but it's still executed as badly as Michael Clarke Duncan in The Green Mile.
Honorable mention: Finding Neverland - Enough with the Johnny Depp blowing, film critics, it's been a while since he's made a good movie; The Sixth Sense - when you've got a one-bit premise, try not to make it totally obvious. Unbreakable was infinitely better; Chocolat - a film that was so painfully American in attempting to be French or Italian. Harvey Weinstein definitely engaged in sexual favors for it to be nominated; Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring - what happens, exactly? I'm not a fan of LotR, so I could go on, but all others like opaque cinema where you can actually see Peter Jackson making decisions with extreme close-ups, slow motion, soft focus, and everything but a constant barrage of center wipes; The Departed - it sucked. Scorsese needs to stay out of Boston.
Best Picture Nominees:
2000-2008
American Beauty
Atonement
The Aviator
Babel
A Beautiful Mind
Brokeback Mountain
Capote
Chicago
Chocolat
The Cider House Rules
Crash
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
The Departed
Erin Brockovich
Finding Neverland
Gangs of New York
Gladiator
Good Night, and Good Luck
Gosford Park
The Green Mile
The Hours
The Insider
In the Bedroom
Juno
Letters From Iwo Jima
Little Miss Sunshine
Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring
Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Master and Commander: the Far Side of the World
Michael Clayton
Million Dollar Baby
Moulin Rouge!
Munich
Mystic River
No Country For Old Men
The Pianist
The Queen
Ray
Seabiscuit
Sideways
The Sixth Sense
There Will Be Blood
Traffic
Ryan's Top Five
I have not seen but 30-40% of this list. I shall persevere.
1. "The Sixth Sense" - Tim's right--"Unbreakable" was a lot better (read: good, not bad).
2. "Lost in Translation" - I only saw this once, but damn, this movie was boring. I have to like characters to get involved, and I didn't like any of these people.
3. "Ray" - Jamie Foxx deserved to win best actor. That said, biopics BORE THE BEJESUS out of me.
4. "The Fellowship of the Ring" - I really liked "The Two Towers," this one as boring as sin. Seriously.
5. "Little Miss Sunshine" - I do really like this movie and Steve Carell was great, but the ending was a bit too off for it to be a "best movie." (Keep in mind there are probably many movies I could see that would knock this one off the list.)
Dan's Top 5:
I actually like all the films in the list that I saw in the aforementioned list, with exception of what is noted below.
1. Mystic River - I just flat out didn't like it.
2. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon - All I remember was seeing a bunch of flying around on wires. I didn't get to see the full movie, but I doubt I would have liked it.
3. Erin Brockovich - I like this movie, actually. But I get it already - the main character is a woman.
4. Little Miss Sunshine - Probably one of the worst endings ever, especially for india cinema.
5. Master and Commander: the Far Side of the World - I can't remember the main conflict of this movie. I've seen it, but nothing stuck. I was really expecting more out of this movie.
Honorable mention: Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Top 5 Things to Look Forward to in 2008
Dan's Top 5:
1. Bush's Final Year - I don't care if we collectively decide to elect a seedless Chia Head of Richard Nixon next November. I can't see how even the worst (and there are some pretty bad choices in the primaries) of potential candidates could be anywhere close to the atrocity that has been the George W. Bush administration. I echo the sentiments of David Cross, who claimed that he may go down as the worst American President ever.
2. The Summer Olympics - Sure, it's in China, but who gives a shit? (Other than Communist-fearing Republicans) This is the Olympics, and it gives us all a chance to be distracted and actually proud of our country for a few weeks. It also gives me a chance to listen to Bob Costas (winner of the Not Joe Buck award) for some decent commentary and enjoy a free four-hour concert in the form of the opening ceremonies.
3. Fantasy Baseball - This needs no explanation. The only reason it isn't any higher is because it's an annual occurrence.
4. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull - Reported release date is next summer, and you're going to have to go see it. You have no choice. Either you want to see a fourth awesome movie from the Indiana Jones series, or you want to see who you should blame for making the two-decade effort fall flat on it's face. I have no idea how the movie will be, but it's probably going to be either extremely awesome or extremely poor.
5. The Last Game at Yankee Stadium - There will undoubtedly be a lot of talk about how the final Yankee Stadium game will be the end of an era. While the Yankees of yesteryear might not have been pure evil (I'm not entirely up to date on my baseball history...) the new Yankee Stadium will doubtlessly be tainted with the spirit of the Evil One from day one. Here's to you, Yankee Stadium, and those fabled players of old of whom it is said it's possible not to hate them.
Ryan's Top Five
1. The NFL Draft - How will Carl Petersen fuck this one up? Does Ryan Sims have a younger brother? I don't know, but we have a very high draft pick (as we fucking blow), so I am, of course, intrigued.
2. KC Royals Improbable World Series - KU football wins Orange Bowl, anything on God's Green Earth can happen.
3. KU Basketball National Championship - I still argue that jinxing things is bullshit. Why? I've intentionally NOT jinxed things for most of my life, and what has it gotten me? That FSU Championship in 1993 and nothing else.
4. Fantasy Baseball - Dan said it all.
5. Ryan Fox Fantasy Football Championship Repeat - Damn straight, homey.
Tim's Top 5
Note: I'm posting this in June of 2008.
1. Its inevitable end. - God, this year has been awful.
2. Phillies playoff tickets - Oh man, I really need to do that again this year. I really enjoy playoffs, and it's clear the Indians are screwed.
3. The Indians trading C.C. Sabathia for magic beans - We all know it will happen, I just want to know if we get anything in return.
4. The Bengals falling into the first pick in the 2009 draft. - Welcome back, Bengals.
5. Josh Hamilton winning a triple crown - I'm pulling for him.
Honorable mention: Hopefully economic recovery of some sort. Some of us pay our bills...doesn't that do something?
1. Bush's Final Year - I don't care if we collectively decide to elect a seedless Chia Head of Richard Nixon next November. I can't see how even the worst (and there are some pretty bad choices in the primaries) of potential candidates could be anywhere close to the atrocity that has been the George W. Bush administration. I echo the sentiments of David Cross, who claimed that he may go down as the worst American President ever.
2. The Summer Olympics - Sure, it's in China, but who gives a shit? (Other than Communist-fearing Republicans) This is the Olympics, and it gives us all a chance to be distracted and actually proud of our country for a few weeks. It also gives me a chance to listen to Bob Costas (winner of the Not Joe Buck award) for some decent commentary and enjoy a free four-hour concert in the form of the opening ceremonies.
3. Fantasy Baseball - This needs no explanation. The only reason it isn't any higher is because it's an annual occurrence.
4. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull - Reported release date is next summer, and you're going to have to go see it. You have no choice. Either you want to see a fourth awesome movie from the Indiana Jones series, or you want to see who you should blame for making the two-decade effort fall flat on it's face. I have no idea how the movie will be, but it's probably going to be either extremely awesome or extremely poor.
5. The Last Game at Yankee Stadium - There will undoubtedly be a lot of talk about how the final Yankee Stadium game will be the end of an era. While the Yankees of yesteryear might not have been pure evil (I'm not entirely up to date on my baseball history...) the new Yankee Stadium will doubtlessly be tainted with the spirit of the Evil One from day one. Here's to you, Yankee Stadium, and those fabled players of old of whom it is said it's possible not to hate them.
Ryan's Top Five
1. The NFL Draft - How will Carl Petersen fuck this one up? Does Ryan Sims have a younger brother? I don't know, but we have a very high draft pick (as we fucking blow), so I am, of course, intrigued.
2. KC Royals Improbable World Series - KU football wins Orange Bowl, anything on God's Green Earth can happen.
3. KU Basketball National Championship - I still argue that jinxing things is bullshit. Why? I've intentionally NOT jinxed things for most of my life, and what has it gotten me? That FSU Championship in 1993 and nothing else.
4. Fantasy Baseball - Dan said it all.
5. Ryan Fox Fantasy Football Championship Repeat - Damn straight, homey.
Tim's Top 5
Note: I'm posting this in June of 2008.
1. Its inevitable end. - God, this year has been awful.
2. Phillies playoff tickets - Oh man, I really need to do that again this year. I really enjoy playoffs, and it's clear the Indians are screwed.
3. The Indians trading C.C. Sabathia for magic beans - We all know it will happen, I just want to know if we get anything in return.
4. The Bengals falling into the first pick in the 2009 draft. - Welcome back, Bengals.
5. Josh Hamilton winning a triple crown - I'm pulling for him.
Honorable mention: Hopefully economic recovery of some sort. Some of us pay our bills...doesn't that do something?
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