Top 5 Interrogative Songs

Tim's Top 5:
I blame Dan. He posted a reference to this blog today. So I'm posting, because I came up with something that I think would make for a good sporcle quiz -- providing answers to songs ending in question marks. So that's what this is for me -- you could choose to pick songs that are phrased in the form of a question if you prefer, but I'm sticking to something easy to search for in Itunes -- and the only other songs I can think of are "Are you gonna go my way", "Are you gonna be my girl," and "Do you want to know a secret" none of which would make my list anyway. The fascinating thing is that this is a list where the Jimi Hendrix Experience, CCR, Elliott Smith, John Lennon, R.E.M. and The Clash would have qualifiers, and I didn't pick any of those. (I also forgot the first song that sparked the category -- Elvis Costello's "What's So Funny 'Bout Peace Love and Understanding", although it apparently doesn't have a question mark)

1. Life on Mars? - David Bowie - This is far and away the winner here, although if I'd gone with songs phrased in the form of a question, I wouldn't be able to count it. It's one of my favorite Bowie songs, which means it's one of my favorite songs period. The vocal jumps are matched perfectly by the mostly nonsensical lyrics and the music is just soaring. I can't think of a whole lot of songs that do so much with vocal dynamics, but it's fantastic here.

Answer: possibly, frozen under the water.

2. What Do You Want Me To Say? - Dismemberment Plan - I had actually stumbled onto listening to this album (Emergency and I) today and never once thought to connect this song to the list until I ran the ITunes search. It has a similar sort of emphasis on explosions of sound, but ties in some occasional spoken-word sort of lyrics. I've never listened to anything but this album, but this album is fantastic enough to deserve the hype it gets.

Answer: that you're coming back to DC and will be playing the Black Cat on a Saturday or Sunday night.

3. Isn't it a Pity? - George Harrison - This is a very simple song that goes on for a very very long time, but it doesn't feel that way at all. Another masterpiece from what is far and away the best solo album any Beatle ever released. Yes, I said that. Suck it, Imagine (which had a song that narrow missed this list). This song is also noteworthy because IT includes a question mark in the title, even though the next track (What Is Life) does not. Get with the program, Harrison!

Answer: Yes. 'Tis. You're missed, George.

4. What Difference Does It Make? - Sensefield (cover of The Smiths) - I'm sorry, but I just really don't think that highly of the Smiths song (like most Smiths songs, I can see how someone who is not me would like it, but that person is not me). Jon Bunch's vocaqls are meant for this sort of thing, and Morrissey's spoken-word vocal here doesn't carry the same force. This is a pretty good straight rocker, and I am a sucker for Sensefield.

5. What do you do with a B.A. in English? - Cast of Avenue Q - this is the perfect start to a fantastic show that was even better than I had ever figured possible when I saw it live in London. RIP, Sir Gary Coleman.

Answer: Good luck figuring that out. That's why the song is so perfect.

Honorable mention - there'd be plenty, including the only Alice in Chains song that I like (Would?), but how about: CCR - Have You Ever Seen the Rain?; Elliott Smith - Wouldn't Mama Be Proud?; R.E.M. - What's The Frequency, Kenneth?

Dan's Top 5:
1. The Pixies - Where Is My Mind? - I gained a newfound respect for The Pixies (not that I never had a period of any disrespect) after recently visiting Seattle and the Explore Music Project's exhibit on Nirvana. Yes, Nirvana is worthy of a (fairly well-curated) museum exhibit. One of the pieces was a collection of records from artists that had adopted the punk, do-it-yourself, underground approach, including what sounds like an obvious influence, the Pixies' Surfer Rosa. Though you could argue for "Gigantic" as well, this song stands out as the best on the album, and maybe of The Pixies' career. It employs one of my favorite lyrical techniques, describing a specific event (scuba diving) and projecting upon it deeper meaning (an epistemological investigation of consciousness and thought.) Very easy guitar riff to learn, too.

Answer: Floating (and possibly sleeping) with the fishes.

2. The Smiths - How Soon Is Now? - Being a fan of production value more than lyrical content, I love this song. For me, it exists purely as a vehicle to showcase Johnny Marr's genius for creating cool effect. Two different tremolo effects are used here. One twice as fast as the other, and both on opposing stereo channels. The result is a swirling, lush guitar sound that—while playing minor chords—just puts you in a dark, yet enlightened mood. Oh yeah, Morrissey sings, too.

Answer: Well, you're never going to meet a girl if you don't stop acting so depressed all the time. Sheesh.

3. ABBA - Does Your Mother Know - I'm allowing this song for myself even though the official track name doesn't have a question mark. Why? Because it's my favorite ABBA song. I think I actually didn't get into ABBA until after our last post, so you might be surprised to see them appear in my list. Perhaps the greatest band to fall into the "guilty pleasure" category of many, I think this song in particular demonstrates why I have their catalogue on my hard drive. It's pop music both at its most basic and its most engaging. In other words, it's got a good beat and you can dance to it.

Answer: If no, then it's likely you'd be in a lot of trouble. If yes, then she must be OK with you being a slut.

4. Rockapella - Where in The World Is Carmen Sandiego? - Most people know it simply as a theme song to a kid's game show that aired on PBS. That's exactly what it is. And it fucking rules. "Monday through Friday at FIVE!" (Have you listened to the full version of the song? Very inventive lyrics.)

Answer: Always two steps ahead of you and your grade-school knowledge of geography.

5. The Jimi Hendrix Experience - Are You Experienced? - The title track to Jimi's debut album isn't particularly well-known outside the group of people who are pretty familiar with his work. Most people would probably draw the line at knowing "Foxey Lady" or "The Wind Cries Mary." It's a shame, because this track features fantastic time-reversed guitar snippets throughout, including the main solo. It remains especially hard in this song, however, to divorce Jimi's immense talent from his psychedelic image.

Answer: Well, I have. Let me prove it to you.

Honorable mention: The Beatles - Why Don't We Do It In The Road?, Duran Duran - Is There Something I Should Know?, The Flaming Lips - Do You Realize??, Oasis - Who Feels Love?

Ryan's Top 5:

There'll be some crossover here.  That's what I get for putting this off till today.  [Note: I'm going to exclude songs that apparently lack question marks, so I'm not considering such songs as "Wouldn't It Be Nice" and "Who'll Stop The Rain."]  [Double-note: Fuck note 1 re: my #1, which I can't verify has a question mark.]

1. Velvet Underground - "Who Loves the Sun" - I've always considered this maybe the most perfect pop song ever written, according to my rigidly subjective criteria and considered lack of broad consideration.  Anyway--this song is perfect.  Simple and fun lyrics that have real depth.  Beautiful music.  I sincerely think this song is perfect.

Answer: Apparently not enough people.  Nice work, everyone.

2. The Kinks - "Do You Remember Walter?" - The Kinks Are The Village Green Preservation Society is one of the greatest novels ever written.  If I did my top 5 favorite albums, the first 17 albums would be TKATVGPS (followed by The Clash, London Calling, and Give 'Em Enough Rope 7 times each.  I'm too busy to calculate the math on that one.)  Anyway, I love The Kinks' style--fairly simple lyrics with a nice gut-punch at the end.  "Yes people often change / But memories of people can remain."  

Answer: I do but then I'm an Anglophile.  

3. The Smiths - "How Soon Is Now?" - I think the general opinion among Smiths fans is that this song is overrated, as it's one of very few that actually got radio airplay (and gets radio airplay today).  Anyway, I'd slot this in my top 15 Smiths songs (hello new Top 5 list?)--the guitar is haunting, and I am in love with the line, "You shut your mouth / How can you say / I go about things the wrong way / I am human and I need to be lo-o-oved / Just like everybody else does."  Morrissey has a way of drawing out his lines so uniquely ["lo-o-oved"].

Answer: A bit too soon, I'm going to grab a snack first.

4. The Smiths - "What Difference Does It Make?" - Hi.  I'm Ryan.  I am a Morrissey fanboy.

Answer: Not a damn bit.

5. The Smiths - "Is It Really So Strange?" - Yep.

Answer: Nah.

Honorable Mentions - Where Is My Mind?, Life on Mars?, Why Don't We Do It In The Road?, Are You Experienced?, Have You Ever Seen The Rain?

Ashley’s Top 5:

I am honored to be included in this Top 5.  Here is my humble contribution.

1. R.E.M. – “What’s the Frequency, Kenneth?” – I’ve never gotten sick of this song, even after excessive airplay when Monster came out.  So while other R.E.M. songs always beat this one for me in terms of all-time favorites, this one is still legitimately awesome.

Answer: My guess is that everyone knows the story behind this song and the attack on Dan Rather and the dubious connection to Donald Barthelme (incidentally one of my favorite writers) so I’ll leave it at that—it’s either a nonsensical question, or one to which Mr. Rather apparently didn’t know the answer.

2. The Ramones – “Do you Remember Rock ‘n Roll Radio?” – End of the Century was a radical departure in sound for the Ramones and this song is pretty indicative of that fact.  You can hear the Phil Spector influence on this track especially and more than anything, it’s pretty relevant based on the shit that gets played on the radio these days.

Answer: Not the radio that the Ramones are talking about, but I remember it sounding a whole hell of a lot better when I was younger. 

3. Superchunk – “Does Your Hometown Care?” – I had forgotten that this song was on the SubUrbia soundtrack, which I thought was a good movie in high school but may very well not be since I haven’t seen it since.  Fun fact, in an Intro to Theatre class in college we read the Eric Bogosian play on which the film is based.  The Superchunk song is great even though it’s from their softer years, which honestly are growing on me as I get older. 

Answer: Yeah. Norfolk cares. Norfolk loves me.

4. Slant 6 – “What Kind of Monster Are You?” – Slant 6’s seminal record Soda Pop * Rip Off actually has two interrogative songs on it—the blistering opener “Don’t You Ever?” and this one, and though it’s really close, “What Kind of Monster Are You?” wins for me.  This was one of my favorite albums years ago when I lapped up everything Dischord records had put out in the early nineties, and this is one of the few from that phase that I still listen to.

Answer: I hope I’m not a monster at all, but if I am I bet I’m pretty benevolent.

5. The Promise Ring: “Is This Thing On?” – In some ways I’ve never gotten over this band. From another album with multiple interrogatives (“Why Did Ever We Meet?” is the other one, and it almost won because it has what I thought was a great video in high school, probably because of the rollerblading and the animal suits), this is the opening track to 1997’s Nothing Feels Good and it sets the tone for the whole album. Not only is the song good, but it contains a puzzling interrogative in the lyrics: “Delaware, are you aware of the air supply?”

.

Answer: Yes. Yes it is.

Honorable mentions: Rilo Kiley, “Does He Love You?,” The Promise Ring, “Why Did Ever We Meet?,” CCR, “Have You Ever Seen the Rain?” Jawbreaker, “Do You Still Hate Me?” The Buzzcocks, "Ever Fallen In Love With Someone You Shouldn't Have?"

Top 5 Cover Songs That Are Better Than The Original Versions

Pretty self-explanatory; the topic came up when we were at a bar and someone said that "Crimson and Clover" by Joan Jett & The Blackhearts was the best cover song ever. A-haha.

Ryan's Top 5:

1. "Everybody's Talkin'" - Harry Nilsson - This is definitely one of my favorite songs of all-time, so you bet your ass it's my favorite cover song. Fred "Not Harry Nilsson" Neil apparently performed a version of this song that pre-dates this one. Go figure!

2. "All Along the Watchtower" - Jimi Hendrix - This is the quintessential example, for me; nothing wrong with the Dylan version, but the Hendrix rendition is iconic rock.

3. "I Fought the Law" - The Clash - Once again, I like older versions of the song, but The Clash definitely knows how to amp up the ass-kickery. I'm fairly sure The Clash could cover anything and I'd like it better.

4. "I Will Survive" - Cake - Cake does the song in their own particular styling. Notably, they amend this lyric: "I should have changed my fucking lock / I would have made you leave your key." See that? They added the word "fucking." Brilliant!

5. "Stand By Me" - John Lennon - This narrowly defeats Van Halen's cover of "You Really Got Me," which loses points because The Kinks are one of my favorite bands. Anyway, I guess it's not a given that this version is incredibly superior--if you're a big R&B fan--and I'm not--so in the end this wins. Also, I like John Lennon. A lot.

Dan's Top 5:

1. Aretha Franklin - Respect (orig. by Otis Redding) - This is the only instance I can think of where the song's meaning is essentially transformed. When Aretha sings it, her womanhood is an essential element of the song.

2. Johnny Cash - Hurt (orig. by Nine Inch Nails) - Easily the newest original on the list to be covered, and by a man who was a living legend. If the Man In Black wants to sing your song, you know it's good.

3. Cream - Crossroads (orig. "Cross Road Blues" by Robert Johnson) - OK, I haven't heard the original, but "Crossroads" is my favorite Cream song.

4. Jimi Hendrix - All Along The Watchtower (orig. by Bob Dylan) - While I agree almost 100% with Ryan's selections, I've allowed myself one overlapping listing. This is it, because Jimi rocked and Dylan's got plenty of other good songs. He can spare one.

5. The Dropkick Murphys - The Fields of Athenry (orig. recorded by Danny Doyle) - Gains the quality of being much more easily adapted to sports scenarios.

Honorable Mention: Van Halen - You Really Got Me (orig. by The Kinks), Gnarls Barkley - Reckoner (orig. by Radiohead) - only omitted because it's not been released, Joe Cocker - With A Little Help From My Friends (orig. by The Beatles), Creedence Clearwater Revival - Heard It Through the Grapevine (orig. by Gladys Knight and the Pips) - omitted because it's too damn long.

Tim's Top 5:

1. If Not For You – George Harrison - The slide guitar on If Not For You works so magically, I don’t even know how to explain it. I think this is one of the greatest love songs ever recorded, not that you’ll be able to tell from that recording. And as much as I love Bob Dylan, his version of his own song just doesn’t measure up. It sounds like he was borrowing some of Hendrix’s work from All Along the Watchtower and makes it a fluff pop song. Harrison’s recording is a sincere and plaintive cry, almost an elegy in advance. The fact that it also works so well on All Things Must Pass means it would be sacrilege to put any lower down the list.

2. Hard to Handle – Black Crowes – I am a fan of Otis Redding’s version, but it’s not even a close contest. The Black Crowes completely reinvent this song and make it sound completely current (both for 1990 and 2009) and I was in disbelief when I actually opened the liner notes of Shake Your Moneymaker and saw that Otis Redding wrote the song. It’s the quintessential Black Crowes song, the best on what is an absolutely phenomenal album, and this song works blissfully well with the country-tuned sounds that they bring to the table on the album.

3. Slut – Big Star* - I include it solely because it’s on a released album, the inaptly titled “Columbia – Big Star Live at Missouri University” album that is inaptly titled, since 1) it’s not really Big Star (hence the asterisk -- it’s the second iteration of Big Star -- Alex Chilton, Jody Stephens, and two members of the Posies (Auer/Stringfellow), since Chris Bell had died long before the “reunion” show), and 2) there is no such thing as Missouri University. Nice try. But it is a phenomenal performance overrun with exuberance that far outpaces the comparatively turgid and horribly produced Todd Rundgren original. A faster tempo and the less enunciated voice of Alex Chilton prove the key here. If I ever put together a band, there is absolutely no way we would not cover this song in the style Big Star does. “S-L-U-T…she may be a slut, but she looks good to me.”

4. Do Ya – Matthew Sweet – Another live cover, this one is documented on Live From 6A, a compilation CD of recordings from Late Night with Conan O’Brien. It’s the lone track on the album that wasn’t actually performed on the show; they did the track as the sound check before the show. It’s a song that’s uniquely Matthew Sweet, perfect for his voice and unassuming tone and captures the superb musicians that he always surrounded himself with for his albums and tours. ELO isn’t a great band, but they are made to create good covers (OK Go almost made the list for covering “Don’t Bring Me Down,” but it’s hard to say their version is definitively better than the original. No such problem here.)

5. I’ll Feel A Whole Lot Better – Tom Petty – There’s nothing quite so ironic as getting on this list by covering a band who made their career by covering other people’s songs. But it worked for Tom Petty, who included this version of a Byrds hit on Full Moon Fever. The cleaner digital production is 99% of the reason that this song improves upon the Byrds song, which is one of their best. But the recording is dated, tinny, contains a heavy tambourine and sounds like a hit song played on an AM radio (unsurprisingly). Petty’s song is a much clearer recording and seems a note higher, matching the song more closely with its lyrics.

Honorable mention: 99 Problems – Jay-Z – I exclude this because it’s not really a cover, even though it takes its title and chorus from Ice-T’s cut of the same name. But if it were a cover…oh, it’s on the list; Harvey Danger – Save It For Later – Harvey Danger was way too good a one-hit wonder band to burn out as fast as they did; Draggin’ the Line – R.E.M. – this one-note performance is on the Austin Powers: the Spy Who Shagged Me soundtrack, and is easily the best thing about that horrific movie. Why more people don’t cover Tommy James songs is well beyond me. They’re a guaranteed success – Mony Mony and I Think We’re Alone Now were both hits for later artists, this song is awesome, and Crimson and Clover just begs to be covered (although apparently the Joan Jett fan Ryan mentioned already thinks that job's done); All Along the Watchtower – Jimi Hendrix; It Ain’t Me Babe – The Turtles, Quinn the Eskimo – Manfred Mann - I lump these in because they’re all Bob Dylan covers. Covering Bob Dylan is obvious, but only a few stick out as real successes. The Turtles capture a sardonic taunting tone to a song that Dylan left untouched, Hendrix simply created a new song, and Manfred Mann recorded a ludicrously catchy but still inexplicable song.

Top 5 Songs You Used To Be Into

Here's the deal... I tend to get really into songs over the period of a few days if I like them. But sometimes they aren't always committed to memory. So this list is my attempt to go back and find (I used Livejournal) songs that I used to be into but I had forgotten about. I don't know if anyone else can conjure up a list, but I can, so here goes...

Dan's Top 5

1. John Lennon - Watching The Wheels - This one is the reason I did the list. I was watching Wonder Boys for the first time in years recently, and I rediscovered this classic Lennon tune, which I'm convinced is one of his Top 5 songs. Now I'm hooked on it again.

2. Grand Theft Audio - As Good As It Gets - A little-known crappy industrial band puts out one of my favorite songs ever. The guitar is reminiscent of Sweet Child O' Mine, but it was original enough to get me hooked for months back in high school. Sadly, this artist, whoever they were, didn't go anywhere, and this wasn't even their most popular song.

3. The Cult - She Sells Sanctuary - This used to be the track used in a often-aired car commercial. I don't remember the model or make, but I did get addicted to this song, even putting it on my very first mix CD. Once the CD got scratched, I didn't really listen to the song anymore.

4. George Harrison - When We Was Fab - If I were organizing due to degree of forgotten-ness rather than quality, this would have been right at the top of the list. I think the last time I thought of this song, let alone listened to it, was seven years ago. The sum total of times I had listened to it before tonight fit into a single week.

5. Moby - We Are All Made of Stars - I remember listening to this song a lot when it was first released, because I thought it was so reminiscent of "Heroes." I soon stopped listening to Moby, for whatever reason, and subsequently didn't listen to this song until I rediscovered Moby as a result of the Bourne movies. Good song.

Honorable Mentions: Pink Floyd - Bike, Tenacious D - Wonderboy, The Who - Boris The Spider, Dr. Hook - Looking for Pussy, Camper Van Beethoven - Take The Skinheads Bowling, Stabbing Westward - Angel

Ryan's Top Five

Let's see here... I'm going to go way back.

1. Devo - "Whip It" - This was my favorite song circa the 1980s. Being six, however, is no excuse not to whip it, and whip it good. Into shape. Shape it up. Get straight. Go forward. Move ahead. Try to detect it. It's not too late. To whip it. Whip it good. Great, now you've got me dancing the robot.

2. MC Hammer - "Can't Touch This" - You cannot, in fact, touch this. Repeat--do not try to touch this.

3. The Escape - "Wild, Wild West" - "Headin' for the nine-tays, livin' in the wild wild west!"

4. Meat Loaf - "Paradise By The Dashboard Light" - Or, as I called it when I was 10, The Baseball Song. I did not yet realize that baseball can be a metaphor for other things. (As soon as I figure out what those other things are, I'll pass it on.) Scout's Honor (I was a Tiger Cub for one meeting), this is straight from memory (Cartman/Come Sail Away Style): "Stop right there! I gotta know right now! Before we go any further do you love me? Will you love me forever do you need me? Will you NEVER leave me? Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life, will you take me away, will you make me your wife? (REPEAT) Before we go any further do you LOVE me, and will you leave forever? "Well let me sleep on it, baby baby let me sleep on it (doo doo doo doo doo), let me sleep on it, I'll give you an answer in the morning. (REPEAT) I gotta know right now! Will you love me, will you love me forever do you need me? Will you never leave me? Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life, will you take me away, will you make me your wife? (BOTH PARTS) Let me sleep on it--Will you love me forever?--Let me sleep on it--Will you love me foreveeeer? I can't take it any more (something--didn't know lyric here as kid, still don't) ah crazy feeling coming over like a tidal wave, something something... I swore to _____ and on my mother's grave that I would love you till the end of time, I swore! I would love you till the end of time DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN So now I'm praying for the end of time, to hurry up and arrive! Cuz if I have to spend another minute with you I don't think that I'm gonna survive. I'll never break my promise or forget my vow, we go any further something something right now, Praying for the end of time that's all that I can do, DO, DOOOOO...praying for the end of time so that I can eeeeend myyyyy tiiiiiime wiiiiith yooooooooouuuu..." Phew. That's off my chest.

5. Prince - "Partyman" - Here's a hit from the Batman soundtrack. ("Throw it.") If you ever catch me whinging about my upbringing (I won't), just remind me of this: my parents were apparently cool enough to buy me a "Parental Advisory--Explicit Lyrics" vinyl for my 6th birthday. Maybe I am an example of what happens when you do that. Uh oh...

Honorable Mention: "What's Up?" by 4 Non-Blondes, which wasn't ancient enough to make the list.

Tim’s Top 5:
I don't really know how to handle this topic, because most any song that I used to be into is also a song that I am still appreciative of. So I'm just going to list songs that I knew were my favorite song at one point in my life, all of which were at least 12 years ago.

1. “You Can Call Me Al” by Paul Simon – This was my favorite song growing up. It’s now on an album that would be one of my favorites if I remembered it existed in the middle of an otherwise underwhelming solo career. My first grade art teacher played Graceland all the time. Though I remember nothing about her and nothing from her class, I can therefore declare that she is hands down the best teacher I’ve ever had. Take that, higher education.

2. “The Man Who Sold The World” by Nirvana – It wasn’t until last year (seriously) that I heard the Bowie version, but this recording from the Unplugged album was what made me realize I was seriously late in getting into Nirvana in 1996. It was my favorite song for a while after that before it was displaced by Instant Karma (though like Dan and Ryan, I also actually like the songs from Double Fantasy).

3. “One Stop Along The Way” by Terry Cashman – We’re reaching way back for this classic gem that no one outside of Cincinnati has probably ever heard. Terry Cashman, America’s greatest musical poet, made a living recording songs that were about baseball and nothing but baseball. This song was made upon the event of Johnny Bench’s retirement. Given my proximity to Cincinnati…it’s a must have and I nearly wept when I discovered it was available on ITunes for a mere 99 cents, easily less than 1% of what I would have paid for it if necessary.

4. “Burn On” by Randy Newman – The theme from the magnificent 1989 film Major League, I liked this song too much for words, spent a fair percentage of my college life attempting to locate it on networks and ultimately succeeding. It captures the overwhelming malaise of Cleveland and Cleveland baseball and emphasizes just why it feels like it’s a town for someone like me.

5. “I’m Henry VIII, I Am” by Herman’s Hermits – Give me a break, I was 5. I remember my parents playing this song and me acting like a lunatic. Part of me still wants to shell out actual money to hear Herman’s Hermits songs again. The other part of me has fleeting moments of rationality to counter such cringe-worthy thoughts.

Honorable mention: this is all I remember that fit my above description. In more recent years, I have had a bad-faith appreciation of "Snakes on a Plane (Bring It)" by Cobra Starship that still exists on some level to this day and I have way too much affection for "You Know My Name" by Chris Cornell (see guilty pleasures, music).

Top 5 Songs on the White Album

Tim's Top 5:
It's actually among my least favorite Beatles albums. That, however, is like saying that winning it in the lottery is one of my less favored methods of procuring $200 million.

1. I'm So Tired - The desperation comes through clearly in Lennon's lyrics and vocals and he creates a wildly divergent song that starts out crawling, builds, drops back to the crawl and builds to an explosive and frenzied pleading chorus. It's a very simple song, but it shows a more dynamic emotional character than perhaps any other song in the Beatles catalog. It's also got the charm of a work that's clearly not a finished product, something they could never have put on an album before the White Album.

2. Dear Prudence - The bounce to the guitar that makes up the background of the entire song is masterful. It's one of the more cryptic songs and it carries a sort of childlike aura around it. Also noteworthy because Paul McCartney actually played the drums on the track because Ringo Starr had walked away from The Beatles when they began recording it.

3. Helter Skelter - Along with Polythene Pam, this might be as pure a rock 'n' roll song as the Beatles would ever record, and it's hard to believe that it's actually a McCartney song. It's easy to see how Charlie Manson decided this song was telling him something more, since McCartney was rarely this bizarre and abstract in his writing, particularly when, as here, the subject of the song was a piece of children's playground equipment. The deeply buried background vocals are one of the highlights.

4. Everybody's Got Something To Hide Except Me & My Monkey - Ok, it mentions monkeys, so it's hard to neglect it. It's a very simple song with throwaway lyrics, but Ringo's work on the drums is a highlight and the presence of the greatest of all musical instruments -- the cowbell makes it an essential track for me, even to the exclusion of others that I know are better.

5. Happiness Is A Warm Gun - You can tell that John Lennon is my favorite Beatle going away, since four of the five songs here are his, but The White Album may also have been his finest hour. The ironic lyrics, the haunting vocals, and the screeching and moaning guitar help make this the first dual song (the latter being I'm So Tired) on the album, following after A Day In The Life, which was quite literally two songs since it was written in part by both Lennon and McCartney.

Honorable mention: Yer Blues - another Lennon tour de force; Blackbird is a troublingly beautiful song, The continuing adventures of Bungalow Bill - Yoko's vocals are annoying, sure, but there's a really good song behind it; Glass Onion - I know, it's a throwaway pop song, but it's a masterpiece of a throwaway pop song that just showed that they didn't really need to try to write great songs; While My Guitar Gently Weeps - a great song, just not on the list for me, Sexy Sadie - I've said enough.

Dan's Top 5:

1. Dear Prudence - Probably in my Top 5 Beatles songs. Have we done that list yet?

2. While My Guitar Gently Weeps - George Harrison's masterpiece, I believe.

3. Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey - Probably the most fun song on the album. Occasionally I will hear it in a public setting (i.e., Its playing didn't have anything to do with me), and that's always fun.

4. Blackbird - One of the most covered songs on the album, I'm sure. It loses points for the bird sound effects towards the end.

5. Helter Skelter - I'm including this one because the guitar intro is so dissonant, leading me to believe it was an inspiration for early heavy metal artists. (The album was released in '68, the same year Black Sabbath formed.) The song was created in order to top The Who's "I Can See For Miles."

Ryan's Top Five

1. "Helter Skelter" - I devoted most of my Ranking Time to song #1 versus song #2. I am a bit of a Lennon-phile and I typically prefer his music to McCartney's... but this song just kicks too much ass. "Proto-metal" at its finest. I don't know how to listen to this song on anything other than max volume.

2. "Happiness is a Warm Gun" - This song epitomizes what's so great about Lennon; his lyrics may be indecipherable at times, but they're biting and unassailably cool (thank you Rob Gordon). The music fucking rules, and I love the bitter irony of happiness being a warm gun. "When I hold you in my arms / And I feel my finger on your trigger / I know no one can do me no harm." This set to the tune of a doo-wop "bang bang shoot shoot." Awesome.

3. "Dear Prudence" - This was my favorite song for a while. I still love it but I've grown out of it a bit. That said, I have a weakness for songs with rocking crescendos.

4. "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" - This is George Harrison's second-best Beatles song (after "Here Comes the Sun"...do I sense another Top 5 list?). To wax English-teachery, I have always loved the titular personification. I love the idea of a guitar weeping.

5. "Back in the USSR" - It was either this or "Blackbird," and I think I'm just in more of a rock mood lately. This song deserves major cred for setting up "Dear Prudence" (let alone the album) so well.

Footnote: "Revolution" is awesome. "Revolution 1" sucks.