Top 5 Lines from Office Space

I thought of this when I landed on Office Space on Comedy Central while I was flipping through the channels tonight. And it is rather appropriate, as this site has taken a nose-dive over the past month or so, and I'm guessing the biggest reason for all of us (assuredly, the biggest reason for me) can be summed up with Office Space's tagline: Work Sucks.

1. "It's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care." - Peter Gibbons - For me it's really impossible to put this anywhere but #1, even though #2 makes me laugh the most. Not only is it hilarious, it's really a statement of philosophy that has guided my academic and professional life since I first saw Office Space at 3:30am on a Sunday night (read: Monday morning) while I was in high school.

2. "You know, the Nazis had pieces of flair that they made the Jews wear." - Peter.

3. "I can't believe what a bunch of nerds we are, we're looking up money laundering in the dictionary." - Peter.

4. Bob: "Looks like you've been missing a lot of work lately Peter."
Peter: "I wouldn't say I've been missing it, Bob."

5. Bob, to Tom: "What would you say, you DO around here?" I love this line even more after becoming a teacher, as I wanted to repeat it to about half of my students around the time I was entering grades for progress reports.

Honorable mentions: literally everything else in the movie.

Dan's Top 5:

1. "I did absolutely nothing, and it was everything that I thought it could be." - Peter Gibbons

2. "No way. Why should I change? He's the one who sucks." - Michael Bolton

3. "What am I gonna do with 40 subscriptions to Vibe?" - Peter Gibbons

4. "The thing is, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care." - Peter Gibbons

5. "This is a... fuck!" - Samir Nagheenanajar

Tim's Top Five:
1) "There was nothing wrong with it... until I was about 12 years old and that no-talent ass clown became famous and started winning Grammys." -- this entire sequence warrants quotation, see Dan's #2, but, alas. No-talent ass clown has been in my vernacular because of this line.

2) "Well, the type of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do."

3) "Shit. I'm a free man and I haven't had a conjugal visit in six months."

4) "You know, the Nazis had pieces of flair that they made the Jews wear."

5) "No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' something like that, man."